Thursday, March 31, 2011

I Think Jamaican in the Moonlight

I beg your pardon, mama, what did you say?
My mind was drifting off on Martinique Bay.
It’s not that I’m not interested, you see;
Augusta, Georgia is just no place to be.
- Nitty Gritty Dirt Band - American Dream
And with weather like this...

...Augusta is definitely no place to be...

Unless you're dressed like a Crossing Guard...

My home for the next 13 days.

Hey, at least the rain is keeping the pollen at bay...


Wednesday, March 30, 2011


"That was NOT one of MY wishes..."
"Who said anything about granting YOUR wishes?"


CSpan Live Feed

I see the US Budget negotiations are progressing...


Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Inaccurate Metaphors

A couple days back, 'Puter over at the Gormogons threw down a metaphor that although the sentiment was correct, the concept was completely incorrect...

Since brutally attacking misguided E.J. Dionne columns is a part time hobby of 'Puter's, like shooting fish in a barrel and taking candy from babies, 'Puter figured it would be appropriate to give Mr. Dionne credit when he gets something right.

I'll give you the "fish in a barrel" metaphor...


...but anyone that ever says "Easy as taking candy from a baby"
has never TRIED taking candy from a baby.

Just sayin'...


Monday, March 28, 2011

How's It Going at Key Biscayne?

Anyone got a sit-rep for us?

"Dude...Someone roll up another stick of Coconut Grove Green."


Sunday, March 27, 2011

There is a Special Hell...

...for scientists like this:

(Click for full size image)

According to St. Ass, this is real, judging from some of the seals and watermarking...
He said that at the time, the Soviet Union was doing anything and everything to beat the West in technological advancement.

Very disturbing...


Photos From The Road

Graffiti without reflection.

The individual that scrawled this in the dust on the back of the truck obviously isn't too familiar with the act. There is a decided downside.
This individual never took a moment to reflect on the view...

Just keep driving...

I have it on good authority that there is no room at the Inn.

So close, yet so far...

Nothing like sitting dead stopped in the Lincoln Tunnel for 49 minutes...


Saturday, March 26, 2011

Saturday Night in Queens

WTF is up with the weather?
I left Jax Beach it was 81 degrees & beautiful.
I arrived here in Corona Park and it's 30 degrees.

Hey- has anyone looked at the calendar?
March 21 was the first day of Spring...

They are calling for a high tomorrow of 41 degrees...Low of 26.
High of 39 for Monday.

And second...
Is this a Holiday Inn or a zoo?

My next-door neighbor

And I think she has found the Comedy Channel, or perhaps a Jerry Springer marathon, based on the frequency and intensity of the whooping coming through the wall.

This is going to suck.

Double suck.


One Pot Dinner

What's YOUR problem?


Friday, March 25, 2011

Friday Night is Date Night

It's date night... Take your best girl out for a spin on you scooter;
Maybe dinner and a movie will put her "in the mood"...


Recoil Therapy

Waaay too much fun...

Try your hand at keeping your Steyr on target...

(H/T to Chad @ Guns! Guns! Guns!)


Blogging might get a bit sparse for the next few days.

Watch for updates from the road...


Monday, March 21, 2011

Star Trek meets Monty Python

Back in the Office for a day or two...
ZachC of The Wrong Way stopped by my lair office to discuss the possibility of a camping trip to the Tortugas Career Development Seminar and, as always, we were unable to stay on-topic.

ZC: "Dude, google 'Star Trek Monty Python'"

Yours Truly: "But Z... I have many time-sensitive, important tasks that I must tend to in order to be a productive cog in the machinery of our benevolent employer.
I have no time for foolishness!"

ZC: "Pull the other one, it has bells on it... Just google it."

YT: "Alas, I must wait until later tonite, after I have put in a full, productive day and travel back to my humble abode, then I shall look into your YouTube foolishness. Good day sir."

ZC: "C'mon, Big Guy..."

YT: "I said good day sir. Begone, so I might be able to concentrate on my job."

ZC was attempting to alert me to an even more entertaining Star Trek/Monty Python mashup than the previously posted "What's in Spock's Scanner"...

I have to say, when I watched it I did giggle like a little schoolgirl.
If you don't, you have a defective sense of humor, and should probably see a doctor.

Thanks for the tip, Z...


Sunday, March 20, 2011

Blogroll Addition

I found out from Borepatch that PISSED, Constant Reader and occasional commenter has his own blog that I hadn't been previously aware of.
Upon perusal I found it tasty and informative and suggest you add it to your Recommended Daily Allowance of Interwebz.

Seems he has also linked back to my li'l ol' site here, and I am all about reciprocity, be it State-to-State CWLs or links from other site...

Go read The Feral


Saturday, March 19, 2011

Signs of our Times - Flamingo Edition

We weren't too concerned about the vultures...

Floating log?

Not in the Everglades, man.

Just a little 8-footer hanging out at the Dam...

And by the way - regarding the sign...
"Vultures are a federally protected migratory species and may not be harmed"...?
Are they rare or endangered? No...
Then why the protection?
Beats the hell outta me... Other than the obvious-
Control. Enviro-weenies & Progressives want to control everything.
Migratory Bird Treaty Act of 1918
Read it and puke.


On the Street - Miami - 3/17

So... In our infinite wisdom, we were in Miami for St. Patty's Day.

Ostensibly, we were on hand to build the new SpeedServe cage for the Sony/Ericsson Tournament. It was just a happy coincidence that it was March 17th.

We (Gars, Jingalls & Yours Truly) busted ass all day, and with a little timely help near the end, we got the cage built.

We retired to our respective abodes off Brickell Avenue with plans to meet up for a drink and dinner...

Now- This is Miami, not Savannah.
I wasn't expecting the nightmare crowds on Miami Ave in Downtown... Wall-to-wall drunkenness doesn't begin to describe it.

When you mix Irish Drinking Tradition, A Latin Propensity for Escalation to Violent Interaction, and 5,000 people stuffed into a very small "street party" location...
Well, let's just say I had to leave VERY soon after arriving.
I have no patience for idjits who have over-imbibed before 9:00pm.

I saw more people that were hell-and-gone inebriated before a reasonable hour that night. What the hell, man? And this is Miami, for crying out loud...

I mean- I know people here can party with the best of them, but to see that many people barfing-in-the-street shitfaced by 9?
Hell, that's sign of Amateur Hour, not hardcore party people.
I mean, I would expect it in Savannah, not here in Miami.
I might have expected it on Oct. 10, Día de la Independencia, but not on St. Patrick's Day.
As I waded through the crowd trying to find Jingalls, I kept getting jostled and elbowed...Fortunately I was dead cold sober, which saved at least a couple lives.
I got tired of the pushing, shoving and getting beer spilled on me, so I flipped on my "Coming through! Make a hole!" persona and bulldozed my way to the exit...
Several overdressed Latino males took offense to getting elbowed and spilling their beer on my way out and made ugly noises and perhaps thought for a split-second about defending their machismo, at least until they the saw the author of their hurt- the 6'5 300lb sunburned ogre plowing through the crowd like a runaway D7.
It didn't hurt that the only green I had to wear was an OD Blackwater t-shirt.

I made it out to the less-crowded part of Miami Av and waited for Jingalls...
It was here that I found some interesting blog fodder, to wit:
St. Patrick's Day Pick-Up lines...

"I am SO sorry. Come back to my place and I'll wash my vomit off your shoes."

"Wow... That green beer you're drinking would look awesome barfed up all over my bedroom floor."

"Suuure I'm wearin' green. If ye stick around later, I'll show you my leprecondom."

"Ooh, your feet are HUGE! What would a girl have to do to get a look at your shillelagh?"

"I said, 'Are you drunk yet?'"

"If you're going to pass out anyway, how 'bout doing it at my place?"

"Lassie, it's your ancestral duty to drive the snake out of my pants!"

"I'd like to invite to come catch a leprechaun with me. Maybe together we'll get Lucky!"

"I'm the Magical Leprechaun, and ye caught me, lass! Now I can grant ye one wish, as long as it involves sex."

And last...

"Hey! You wanna (mumble) leprechaun (mutter) my shillelagh (burp) o' the morning to ye (vomit)?"

Alright, back to Jax tomorrow...


Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Fed Up

"That's all I can stand, I can't stands no more"

Casey Heynes - How to deal with a snot-nosed bully.

It's a damn shame he got suspended for it...

But I'll bet the punk that was hitting him won't do it again.


Sunday, March 13, 2011

More Bullshit From The White House

We must seek agreement on gun reforms
-President Obama in Op-Ed in the Arizona Star

You can read it if you like, but here's your money quote:
"...And in the attack's turbulent wake, Americans by and large rightly refrained from finger-pointing, assigning blame or playing politics with other people's pain."
Obviously, Obama has some very selective memory, since not an hour went by before the Left was calling for Palin's blood, vilifying conservatives in general and Tea Party members specifically for fomenting the attack.

So... When Mr. Obama opens his essay with such a blatant untruth, I really didn't need to read any further, but I did anyway and found even more half-truths and prevarications.
Go find them yourself. I'm not doing your homework for you.

All right... One more, just to get you started:

"...I'm willing to bet that responsible, law-abiding gun owners agree that we should be able to keep an irresponsible, law-breaking few - dangerous criminals and fugitives, for example - from getting their hands on a gun in the first place."

Sorry, Mr. Obama, we disagree on the method to keep criminals from getting guns...
Instead of more invasive forms to fill out and faulty background checks,


Update 3/14 1:50P EDT
Jennifer at In Jennifer's Head does an outstanding breakdown of
Mr. Obama's load of horseshit OpEd...
Read it here.

Sunday Cuteness

It's not necessarily teh cuteness, but the comments that people make regarding said cuteness after seeing cute video that really make me chuckle...

First- The Slow Loris

 And the comments:
(from Look! A Baby Wolf...)

Jess says:
Writing from personal experience: exotic critters, especially those in the primate category, have teeth, will bite, crap everywhere and have a tendency to destroy things.
They’re cute, until they get pissed off.

Lynn says:
Yeah, that’s primates for you. We’re all cute until we get pissed off.

Truer words were never spoken scrawled in a comment dialog box.


Saturday, March 12, 2011

Current Events: World-Class Leadership by the White House

In the News:
Egyptians overthrow their dictatorial president and begin to tip toward Iran-style theocracy.

White House response:
The President suggests light rail and green jobs could help the economy.

In the News:
The economy shows serious and significant signs of backsliding.

White House response:
The President resolves that Motown is some of the coolest music ever.

In the News:
Investigations reveal that over 1,000 exceptions to government healthcare have been granted to connected groups, and that the original budget numbers were cooked to hide significant taxpayer losses.

White House response:
The President firmly suggests that a couple dozen state senators from Wisconsin are destroying unions, and that he is resolutely committed to fighting back, maybe, if he has time.

In the News:
The government is poised for a shutdown, as there is no operating budget and no hope of bipartisan cooperation on developing one without presidential leadership.

White House response:
The President thinks that maybe traditional marriage isn't as important as he used to think.

In the News:
Libyan rebels are losing ground fast to federal forces. Civilian death toll rises.

White House response:
The President issues a stern warning about kids bullying kids.

In the News:
Gas prices are skyrocketing due to self-inflicted inflationary pressures and a drilling moratorium.

White House response:
The President points out that as the father of two girls, he wants to see the government address gender-based pay differences in the private sector.

In the News:
Yemen is a powderkeg, Japan is on the brink of nuclear emergency, and the government is still poised for a shutdown.

White House Agenda:
9:00AM - 9:01AM
Global Security Assessment

9:02AM - 5:30pm
March Madness bracket picks.
(Be sure to pander to swing states, special interests)

5:31PM - 10:30PM
Planning Session: Sunday Golf
Which union leaders to be included in playing group?

(Content stolen and adapted from The Gormogons
I expect to hear the Czar's jackbooted thugs at my door any moment now. There is an excellent chance that this will be my last post and I will shortly be spirited off to a gulag 1200km northeast of Yakutsk.)


Friday, March 11, 2011

What's In Spock's Scanner?

Explains a lot, doesn't it?


Language Lesson

Welcome to ASL, lesson #1


Thursday, March 10, 2011

Checking The Dictionary...

Irony. Let me shows you it.


Wednesday, March 09, 2011

Editorial Fail

I guess that since things are diametrically opposed along party lines, that it would stand to reason that Democrats are turned on by Obama's package.



Begone, Vile Wench!

I'd kick her ass to the street too!

H/T to Capt. Jake @ Pirates!


Tuesday, March 08, 2011


"Are we done, Boss? I'm tired of modeling for your snow sculpture... And my ass is freezing."


Good Communications Is The Key

We were discussing squad communications and handsignals at the range this weekend...
I thought it might be worthwhile to review common group movement and action signals.

Know how to communicate with your team. Your life lunch might depend on it.


Monday, March 07, 2011

Welcome Our New Android Overlords

Holy crap, that thing is realistic...

Story here

It just needs some micro-eyemovement...

Crap on a cracker!
It looks like it's breathing...
Man, the Devil is in the details.


A Horse For A Pirate

Is there s Monty Python & the Holy Grail joke here?



Supply your own headline:

Gator Fan runs amok, needs better beer.


Drunk Floridian with unconcealed weapon snaps, attacks bystanders.
Legislators draft legislation to ban bats & beers in same venue.


You turn- post in comments.

(Original article here)


Interesting Solution

They lie to us, we lie to them...

I wonder if this would work?


Gone Fishin'

Looks like Captain Jingalls took some folks out fishing this weekend...

Nice catch, Capt'n.