Sunday, January 18, 2009

20 Worst Things to Eat

I'm trying to eat better these days...
In theory to try to drop a pound or 70, but in reality just to try to make it to the age of 50 before dropping dead from congestive heart failure...

My research has led me to the oh-so-helpful (and guilt inducing) article from Men's Health Magazine and learned me all 'bout so tasty-but-deadly menu items, and got a kick out of some other articles as well...
How to Behave at a Strip Club was interesting, but to tell the truth, I already have a full education in that area... Between the many informative trips to such establishments with PeteO and Jingles I've got the titty bar Ph.D. (Piled Higher and Deeper).
But I digress...

So... the 20 worst things to order at a restaurant...

20 - Worst Fast-Food Chicken Meal
Chicken Selects Premium Breast Strips from McDonald's (5 pieces) with creamy ranch sauce

830 calories
55g fat
(4.5g trans fat)
48 g carbs

The only thing "premium" about these strips is the caloric price you pay. Add a large fries and regular soda and this seemingly innocuous chicken meal tops out at 1,710 calories.

19 - Worst Drink
Jamba Juice Chocolate Moo'd Power Smoothie
(30 fl oz)

900 calories
10 g fat
183 g carbs
(166 g sugars)

Jamba Juice calls it a smoothie; we call it a milkshake. In fact, this beverage contains more sugar than two pints of Ben and Jerry's Butter Pecan ice cream.

18 - Worst Supermarket Meal
Pepperidge Farm Roasted Chicken Pot Pie
(whole pie)

1,020 calories
64 g fat
86 g carbs

The label may say this pie serves two, but who ever divided a small pot pie in half? Once you crack the crust, there will be no stopping.

17 - Worst "Healthy" Burger
Ruby Tuesday Bella Turkey Burger

1,145 calories
71 g fat
56 g carbs

We chose this burger for more than its calorie payload: Its name implies that it's healthy.

16 - Worst Mexican Entree

Chipotle Mexican Grilled Chicken Burrito

1,179 calories
47 g fat
125 g carbs
2,656 mg sodium

Despite a reputation for using healthy, fresh ingredients, Chipotle's menu is limited to king-size burritos, overstuffed tacos, and gigantic salads—all of which lead to a humongous waistline.

15 - Worst Kids' Meal
Macaroni Grill Double Macaroni 'n' Cheese

1,210 calories
62 g fat
3,450 mg sodium

It's like feeding your kid 1 1/2 boxes of Kraft mac 'n' cheese.

14 - Worst Sandwich
Quizno's Classic Italian (large)

1,510 calories
82 g fat
3,750 mg sodium
106 g carbs

A large homemade sandwich would more likely provide about 500 calories.

13 - Worst Salad
On the Border Grande Taco Salad with Taco Beef

1,450 calories
102 g fat
78 g carbs
2,410 mg sodium

This isn't an anomaly: Five different On the Border salads on the menu contain more than 1,100 calories each.

12 - Worst Burger
Carl's Jr. Double Six Dollar Burger

1,520 calories
111 g fat

Carl's brags about this, but also provides convenient nutrition info on its Web site—so ignorance is no excuse for eating it.

11 - Worst Steak
Lonestar 20 oz T-bone

1,540 calories
124 g fat

Add a baked potato and Lonestar's Signature Lettuce Wedge, and this is a 2,700-calorie blowout.

10 - Worst Breakfast
Bob Evans Caramel Banana Pecan Cream Stacked and Stuffed Hotcakes

1,540 calories
77 g fat
(9 g trans fat)
198 g carbs
(109 g sugars)

Five Egg McMuffins yield the same caloric cost as these sugar-stuffed flapjacks.

9 - Worst Dessert
Chili's Chocolate Chip Paradise Pie with Vanilla Ice Cream

1,600 calories
78 g fat
215 g carbs

Would you eat a Big Mac for dessert? How about three? That's the calorie equivalent of this decadent dish. Clearly, Chili's customers get their money's worth.

8 - Worst Chinese Entree
P.F. Chang's Pork Lo Mein

1,820 calories
127 g fat
95 g carbs

The fat content in this dish alone provides more than 1,100 calories. And you'd have to eat almost five servings of pasta to match the number of carbohydrates it contains. Now, do you really need five servings of pasta?

7 - Worst Chicken Entree
Chili's Honey Chipotle Crispers with Chipotle Sauce

2,040 calories
99 g fat
240 g carbs

"Crispers" refers to an extra-thick layer of bread crumbs that soaks up oil and adds unnecessary calories and carbs to these glorified chicken strips.

6 - Worst Fish Entree
On the Border Dos XX Fish Tacos with Rice and Beans

2,100 calories
130 g fat
169 g carbs
4,750 mg sodium

Perhaps the most misleadingly named dish in America: A dozen crunchy tacos from Taco Bell will saddle you with fewer calories.

5 -Worst Pizza
Uno Chicago Grill Chicago Classic Deep Dish Pizza

2,310 calories
162 g fat
123 g carbs
4,470 mg sodium

Downing this "personal" pizza is equivalent to eating 18 slices of Domino's Crunchy Thin Crust cheese pizza.

4 - Worst Pasta
Macaroni Grill Spaghetti and Meatballs with Meat Sauce

2,430 calories
128 g fat
207 g carbs
5,290 mg sodium

This meal satisfies your calorie requirements for an entire day.

3 - Worst Nachos
On the Border Stacked Border Nachos

2,740 calories
166 g fat
191 g carbs
5,280 mg sodium

More fat and sodium than you should be getting in one meal, let alone in a single appetizer.

2 - Worst Starter
Chili's Awesome Blossom

2,710 calories
203 g fat
194 g carbs
6,360 mg sodium

It takes a special talent to turn a single over-sized onion into the fat equivalent of 67 slices of bacon, but the line cooks at Chili's manage this horrific feat with the help of a thick batter, a calorie-loaded dipping sauce, and a vat of bubbling fat.

And the absolute worst item to order:

1 - The Worst Food in America
Outback Steakhouse Aussie Cheese Fries with Ranch Dressing

2,900 calories
182 g fat
240 g carbs

This weapon of mass construction is the caloric equivalent of eating 14 Krispy Kreme doughnuts, before your dinner arrives. Even if you split this "starter" with 3 friends, you'll have downed a meal's worth of calories.

Why guilt-inducing? Because I can see myself ordering any of these items without giving it a second thought...(and in some cases I have ordered them... 'cause I loves me some Aussie Cheese Fries.)



Anonymous said...

Ew. What about 'The Hat's' Chili Cheese Fries? If you don't eat it within 20 minutes, it congeals into a solid, inedible mass.

Anonymous said...

I'd venture that the loaded cheese (and bacon) fries from Cruzers (Jax Bch) is WAY over Outback fries!!