From our "you've gotta be sitting me" file:
This must be a joke, especially with that 9gag watermark. Because wearing these might cause a host of other problems...
And after a moment cogitation, I'm thinking that I might get a pair of these, except that it would lead to misrepresentation or false advertising charges...
(Girls can get away with padded bras, but if a guy wears a stuffed codpiece, things tend to end badly.)
TBG - still down under...
"If Hillary Clinton could guarantee your taxes would be cut in half, but the Republican presidential candidate would keep them the same, would you vote for her?"
Results: Yes 57% No: 43%
Martin Gardner (32), who had been wearing his collection of wristbands from the music festivals he has visited, lost his arm below the elbow during a standard artificial insemination procedure, in which a number of his wristbands became entangled in a horse’s vagina.
BOTTLES of tequila to fans at a basketball game...? (click pic to embiggify)
From The Navy Times:No- I could care less that the Captain got sick, or had an “unduly familiar relationship”...
The cruiser Cowpens was halfway through its Western Pacific cruise earlier this year when the commanding officer got sick.
Capt. Greg Gombert came down with flu-like symptoms in January that confined him to his cabin for about a week. As he was recovering, he contracted something more unusual: temporary facial paralysis.
The non-life threatening disorder makes it difficult to move certain facial muscles and initially can feel like a minor stroke.
Gombert holed up in his cabin to recuperate and began to push responsibilities down to the next most senior officer, a department head with 11 years in uniform with whom the Navy alleges Gombert carried on an “unduly familiar relationship,” according to a report obtained by Navy Times. Lt. Cmdr. Destiny Savage, the ship’s chief engineer and temporary XO, became the “acting CO,” officials now say, and essentially ran the ship — taking contact reports, leading junior officer qualification boards, and chairing department head meetings in the CO’s place.
Savage, a junior officer who was not fully qualified to be a permanent XO, even led at least two replenishments at sea, where the cruiser took on fuel from an oiler as little as 150 feet away in heavy seas, while the captain was in his cabin, according to the Navy’s investigation and interviews with current and former crew members.
Spontaneous orgasm due to yawning? Are you kidding me? Don't take this stuff on Sunday morning before heading off to church, Jocko.Genitourinary Effects-
Decreased nocturnal penile tumescence and delayed ejaculation have been reported.
Cases of spontaneous orgasm associated with yawning and clomipramine (the active ingredient contained in Anafranil) therapy have been reported.
Genitourinary side effects have been reported frequently and have included sexual dysfunction (involving anorgasmia, impotence and decreased libido). Urinary retention has also been reported.
Some other side effects of clomipramine may occur that usually do not need medical attention. These side effects may go away during treatment as your body adjusts to the medicine. Also, your health care professional may be able to tell you about ways to prevent or reduce some of these side effects. Check with your health care professional if any of the following side effects continue or are bothersome or if you have any questions about them:More common:
“A small child, witnesses tell us was 6 to 8 years old, was able to walk up to the officer and was able to pull the trigger.”Yikes! Talk about situational awareness.
“It doesn’t have an external safety or anything like that,” said Lt. Sierra Brucia with the department. “The gun functioned how it was supposed to. When the trigger was pulled, the gun went off.”And...
Yours Truly: "Wow, calling to fire me. I feel somewhat honored."
Big Cheese: "Is the hotel REALLY that bad?"
YT: "It worse. I promise."
BC: "Then you guys move. Find another place."
YT: "Ok, thanks for the approval- I need to give LTC an opportunity to fix it. Moving will throw several monkey wrenches in the mix- site transport, airport transfers, etc. Plus, a couple other LTC staff is there too... The need relief too."
BC: "Regardless - take care of you crew. Get it fixed."
(click)
Worst hotel ever.
Sleep-deprived staff=poor performance.
Options to improve existing location are limited.
Relocation would be preferred.
Sincerely-
The Staff in Kazan
“…if there is anything we can help you with, let us know.”Wow... Well, since you asked...
"This hotel is appalling. Seriously.I pressed the 'Send' button.
I am not kidding when I tell you this is one of the worst places I’ve ever stayed.
It is a by-the-hour hotel attached to a 24-hour “sauna” (nudge-nudge-wink-wink), and the conditions are horrid. There are no wardrobes/dressers or closets, so we are living out of our suitcases.
Housekeeping is limited to towels being changed out every other or every third day (we haven’t figured out the frequency).
There are no window shades and only an ill-fitting pseudo-curtain that barely covers the window.
As the sun comes up at 4:00am at this latitude, the lack of window shades/curtains makes keeping a restful sleeping environment impossible.
And that would be if we were actually able to sleep-
Thiswhorehousehotel has no air conditioning of any sort. Not even a ventilation system to move air in and out of the rooms. There are small oscillating fans (one per room), but they are only able to move hot air around the room, rather than actually cool it.
(And I’ll let you imagine how efficient and well-made this small [Russian-gulag-manufactured] fan is when it comes to ‘quiet’ operation… It’s not quite as loud as someone shaking a tin can full of walnuts, but it’s damned close.)
So, to try to get some relief from the heat, you have to open a window, which is relatively safe if you are on the 2nd or 3rd floor, but not exactly safe if you are on the ground floor.
Opening the windows has its issues also…
With the windows open we get to hear the streetwalkers haggling with the Ivans, the symphony of chirps, whistles and beeps at all hours as the patrons lock their cars and arm their car alarms… And of course the inevitable alarm triggered randomly when someone closes a door too hard.
If you are near the stairway (Yeah, stairway- you think this joint would have an elevator? Hah) you get to hear the tip-tap-tip-tap-tip-tap of hooker heels tripping up and down the stairs all night. Very restful…
Restful is the key-
We are in for some long days- sunup at 4:17 and sunset at 9:40pm;
With extended hours for the schedule of play at the event, and the relatively few hours we will have ‘off’ it would be nice to be able to sleep past 4:00am, and that’s very hard when you’re sweating like a cat in a Chinese restaurant and the room is lit up like the surface of the Sun. (Some of us [Yours Truly] already sweat like a politician taking a polygraph, so it’s leaving some of us more than a little dehydrated.)
Better fans would improve things, but not much. Additionally, putting tinfoil on the windows would fix the sunrise/lighting issue, but the windows would have to be kept closed to have full effect. Probably not possible, even with a better fan.
I’ve mentioned the poor conditions at the hotel to the LTC project manager (Redacted), but Americans bitching about their hotel is probably not high on their priorities list.
Sadly- our DRIVER stays in a better hotel- he asked программист ученого why we were in such a shit-hole, that his place was much better. That's right- our driver was staying at the Kazan Kremlin Marriott.
The obvious solution is relocation, but I’m not sure what possibilities exist- программист ученого is looking into other accommodations that might be available… I don’t know how/what we can work out, but morale among the staff is pretty low at this point…
Sorry to vent, but this is redicking fuckulous.
TBG"
LTC Greeter: "Well-coome Mr. Big Guy! You are most well come."I've not slept in... gah- 29? hours and I'm going to start getting cranky soon.
Yours Truly: "You bet. Where's the friggin' car?"
LTCG: "Wait here for a moment, then we will go to the car."Ah. Excellent.
LTCG: "OK- we can go to the car now."(Astute Constant Readers will notice she didn't say "We'll leave now." Oh no.)
LTCG: "Please to wait right here. We are expecting one more."Are. You. Fucking. Kidding. Me. Question mark.
U.S. intelligence officials released newly declassified information Saturday, stating the National Security Agency’s controversial programs gathering millions of phone and email records helped foil “dozens of potential terror plots.”...Except, of course, the Boston Marathon bombing.
The three-page document regarding the NSA programs was released to congressional intelligence committees, and states the plots were thwarted in the U.S. and more than 20 other countries.
