You what THIS would be good on?
A FAT sandwich...
You know the BLT - Bacon, Lettuce & Tomato...
I've been enjoying FAT sammiches-
Feta, Avocado & Tomato.
And if I can find a jar of this stuff I'll be in hawg heaven.
You, you lucky Interweb-enbled shopped can get it here... I shall have to wait a bit longer to acquire a jar of this tasty condiment.
After being on driveabout for a few days, I saw a tiny smattering of this Island and talked to a lot of people... I have two takeaways from this little foray into the wilds.
First- Hey Australia- knock it off with the double Os.
Seems like when they were making up words and naming things, the common consensus was, if one O is good, two will make it better...
You can see it in some of the basic words that have become commonplace in US nomenclature-
Kangaroo, boomerang, cockatoo,etc.
But, man, take a drive in NSW and it seems like they went nuts when it came to buying vowels, especially Os.
Wahroonga, Koloona, Mooney Mooney (Not to be confused with Kangy Angy), Karool, Koolewong, (right next to scenic WoyWoy), Footts Rd., Kooloora, School (no, wait...), Toohey's (A fine beer beeah, I hear heeah.), Cooranbong, Trooting Park Pakh, Wallaroo, Gooreengi, Booral, Boolambayte, Coolongolook (one of my personal favorites), Coopernook, Booti Booti, Goonook, Coorabak, Googly's Lagoon, Boorganna, Woolgoolga, Cooma, and Narooma to name just a few...
Still with me? Good.
Here's another thing-
Where the hell are all Rs going?
I man, they are right there on the sign... but no one here uses 'em.
Beer - pronounced "Beeah", Carins (a city in N Queensland - pronounced "Caans"), Darwin (City in North Territories) is Dah-win, Forster (city in NSW) pronounced Fos-ta.
The last one almost got me in a fight...
"I'll be staying up the other side of Forster." (pronouncing both Rs in the name)
"Forrrsterrrr? Nevah heard of it."
"Past Newcastle- next to Tuncurry."
"Oh.. yer talkin' about Fos-ta. Ha- you heah this guy? Forrrsterrr. Ha ha! Typical yank."
(Under my breath) "You betcher ass, Bruce. This 'typical yank' owns enough firepower to sink this pathetic excuse for a continent tout-flippin'-suite. Keep screwin' with me and see how it all works out, ya buncha intervocalic alveolar flapping and yod-dropping cretins."
I usually have the TV running as I work on my computer or when I'm working on things around the house/hotel room...
Looks like Australia (or at least some of the TV channels) are stuck in the 60s, 70s & 80s..
Tons of really old sitcoms and a few newer but oddball shows...
Just a few I remember off the top of my head are Get Smart, Charlie's Angels, Brady Bunch, McGyver, M*A*S*H, Hogan's Heroes, Green Acres, and VIP.
VIP, Oh my gawd what a horrible piece of shit, and I'll wager VIP is where 90% of congresscritters get their idea of how guns and shooting works....
The funniest show I've seen lately was an episode of McGyver with an exceptionally young Teri Hatcher as the damsel in distress...
Jeebus- those shows were awful... Damn near bad as most of today's programming...
Since I'm still wandering the wilds of Oz, here's Tom Waits' variation on Waltzing Matilda...
Wasted and wounded, it ain't what the moon did,
I've got what I paid for now
See you tomorrow,
hey Frank, can I borrow
a couple of bucks from you
To go waltzing Mathilda, waltzing Mathilda,
You'll go waltzing Mathilda with me
I'm an innocent victim of a blinded alley
And I'm tired of all these soldiers here
No one speaks English,
and everything's broken,
and my Stacys are soaking wet
To go waltzing Mathilda, waltzing Mathilda,
You'll go waltzing Mathilda with me
Now the dogs are barking and the taxi cab's parking
A lot they can do for me
I begged you to stab me,
you tore my shirt open,
And I'm down on my knees tonight
Old Bushmill's I staggered,
you'd bury the dagger
In your silhouette window light go
To go waltzing Mathilda, waltzing Mathilda,
You'll go waltzing Mathilda with me
Now I lost my Saint Christopher now that I've kissed her
And the one-armed bandit knows
And the maverick Chinamen,
and the cold-blooded signs,
And the girls down by the strip-tease shows, go
Waltzing Mathilda, waltzing Mathilda,
You'll go waltzing Mathilda with me
No, I don't want your sympathy, the fugitives say
That the streets aren't for dreaming now
And manslaughter dragnets
and the ghosts that sell memories,
They want a piece of the action anyhow
Go waltzing Mathilda, waltzing Mathilda,
You'll go waltzing Mathilda with me
And you can ask any sailor, and the keys from the jailor,
And the old men in wheelchairs know
And Mathilda's the defendant,
she killed about a hundred,
And she follows wherever you may go
Waltzing Mathilda, waltzing Mathilda,
You'll go waltzing Mathilda with me
And it's a battered old suitcase to a hotel someplace,
And a wound that will never heal
No prima donna the perfume is on an
Old shirt that is stained with blood and whiskey
And goodnight to the street sweepers,
the night watchmen flame keepers
And goodnight to Mathilda, too
7:00 PM Christmas night...
I'm sitting outside the Harrington Waters Public Library scarfing their WiFi... And it just started raining... Damn, gonna get wet heading back 'home'....
Look close...
There is a huge-ass goanna in the tree. "Goanna" is Australian for "lizard that will bite and claw the s#!+ out of you if you mess with it.".
Goannas are all over places like this:
Best way to avoid the goannas...
Ride on the beach! Woo hoo!
The sport looks pretty straight forward, I think...
A guy flings a ball to try to knock a stick down.
A dude with a canoe paddle tries to bat the ball away...
There is some running that happens when the batter gets a good whack on the ball.
When the ball gets hit, one of the guys in the field tries to catch it.
Jeebus Pete! Have you every felt a cricket ball? It's a heavy, firm ball with a hard cover and a line of exposed stitches...
The poor bastards in the field have to catch that little red bastard, and they have to do it barehanded... Yowza.
"There are 3 grabbers, 3 taggers, 5 twig-runners, and the player at whack-bat. Center tagger lights a pinecone and chucks it over the basket. The
whack-batter tries to hit the cedar stick off the cross-rock. the
twig-runners dash back and forth until the pinecone burns out and the
umpire calls 'hotbox.' then find out out however many score-downs that
adds up to and divide that by 9."
You have a choice to exercise you 2nd amendment rights, and you are using those rights to ensure the safety of yourself and your family...
Consider Australia: For a place that has, for all intents and purposes, outlawed and confiscated all firearms there are reports of shootings every day in newspapers and the news programs...
Every. Damned. Day.
Wh..wh..What?!
If some poor bastard here Down Under wants to practice his self-defense skills it's pretty damn hard...
Stand in a well-lit room and limber up-
Toe-touches, jumping jacks, maybe some push-ups...
Ok- now you're ready.
Start with your hands at your sides, then pull the iPod earphones out of your ears.
Raise you hands above you head, palms out.
Practice this movement until you can do it smoothly without scaring your assailant. No sudden movements. He probably has his finger on the bang switch...
The four rules are not for him...
Practice pulling your wallet out and throwing it on the ground in front of you. Again, slow and deliberate. No surprises.
Another move you can practice -
With you hands in the 'surrender' position, practice dropping to your knees, hands on your head, fingers interlaced.
In this position, you can lean forward and then lay face-down, as the assailant decides whether to rob you, or rob you AND shoot you...
The next move you can work on has a couple variations-
The primary move is to get your mobile phone out of your pocket and dial 911 (or whatever the local equivalent is).
Variation one- getting the phone out of your pocket after you're relatively sure the assailant is gone- move slowly so in case he's still around you won't be the recipient of a 9mm round from an 'accidental discharge'...
(Remember- when most of these choirboys get caught after shooting someone, they always say that the shooting was accidental, that he didn't intend to shoot, the gun just went off.)
The other variation to practice is getting your cell phone out and dialing 911 while holding pressure on a gunshot wound to your abdomen or chest.
Alternatively- if you have a partner you can practice with, simulate holding pressure to a wound on your partner, while getting you phone out and dialing.
The other part of self-defense to practice is the telephone etiquette with the 911 operator- Be clear and concise, no crying; Try not gasp or groan, since this will unnerve the operator. Be exact when giving directions of where the operator should send the police, ambulance or coroner's wagon...
Hope this helps you out...
TBG- ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒE
*Trivia:
Kings Cross in Sydney is the red light district.
59 Kings
Cross is one of the oldest brothels in the city...or was it that they
have the oldest hookers in the city? I forget. But-
Coincidence? I think not.
I almost screwed up big-time.
('Almost' my ass. I did screw up. I got lucky.)
I decided to do a little snorkeling up around the rocks at Crowdy Head...
I didn't bother to take a good hard look at the water movement patterns where I planned to dive.
Waves roll ashore on the long strech of beach outside Harrington. The water moves northeast along the beach then out to sea at the rocks at Crowdy Head...
I had no issues for th efirst 30 minutes in the water near the rocks, but as soon as I got outside the shorebreak, all of a sudden I was moving out to sea pretty fast...
Oh shit.
Ok... Remember the rules on rip currents. Don't fight against the current- swim parallel to the shore until you are out of the flow...
Swimming I have no problem with...
And I also have some really good built-in flotation.
(First time I've been happy about that...)
I was pretty far out- probably about 500 and 600 yards in about 25
feet of water, so I could see my progress by watching the bottom and I
was finally starting to make headway back to the beach. The waves were
starting to carry me in, and I finally got back to shore...
A - Where I started to get into trouble
B- Where I realized my mistake
C - Where I finally made the turn back in to the beach
D - Where I collapsed on the beach and reflected on my screwup
Plan B was to try to round the point and come in on the other side of the peninsula, but that would have been a mile plus, and there is a pretty deep trench there, and probable some fearsome beasties...
This particular beach is not patrolled and doesn't have lifeguards...
I'm kinda happy about that now, but there were a couple moments while I was out there that I probably would have been happy to take the humiliation of having to be "rescued".
1. Depart my cozy little cabin for whatever trouble I am going to get into today. 2. Repeat to self "Keep left, keep left, keep left." 3. Pack stuff into topcase, make sure case is latched shut. 4. Repeat to self "Keep left, keep left, keep left." 5. Take bike through pre-ride checklist. 6. Get on and start bike. 7. Repeat to self "Keep left, keep left, keep left." 8. Depart Colonial Leisure Village and Campground 9. Pull into right lane. 10. Notice car coming toward me down the road. 11. Swerve into correct lane - Repeat to self "Keep left, keep left, keep left DUMBASS."
1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me for the path is narrow. In fact, just piss off and leave me alone.
2. Sex is like air. It’s not that important unless you aren’t getting any.
3. No one is listening until you fart.
4. Always remember you’re unique. Just like everyone else.
5. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
6. If you think nobody cares whether you’re alive or dead, try not submitting your TEEMS.
7. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you’re a mile away and you have their shoes.
8. If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you.
9. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day with Jingalls.
10. If you lend someone twenty bucks and never see that person again, it was probably well worth it.
11. If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything.
12. Some days you are the bug; some days you are the windshield.
13. Don’t worry; it only seems kinky the first time.
14. Good judgment comes from bad experience … and most of that comes from bad judgment.
15. A closed mouth gathers no foot.
16. There are two excellent theories for arguing with women. Neither one works.
17. Generally speaking, you aren’t learning much when your lips are moving.
18. Experience is something you don’t get until just after you need it.
19. We are born naked, wet and hungry, and get slapped on our ass … then things just keep getting worse.
20. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
Still in Oz...
I'm heading off on walkabout- or rather driveabout...
Updates as connectivity becomes available.
Meanwhile, a serenade for you-
I'm leavin' my fam'ly
Leavin' all my friends
My body's at home
But my heart's in the wind
Where the clouds are like headlines
On a new front page sky
My tears are salt water
And the moon's full and high
And I know Martin Eden's
Gonna be proud of me
And many before me
Who've been called by the sea
To be up in the crow's nest
Singin' my say
Shiver me Timbers
'Cause I'm a-sailin' away
And the fog's liftin'
And the sand's shiftin'
I'm driftin' on out
Ol' Captain Ahab
He ain't got nothin' on me, now.
So swallow me, don't follow me
I'm trav'lin' alone
Blue water's my daughter
'n I'm gonna skip like a stone
So please call my missus
Gotta tell her not to cry
'Cause my goodbye is written
By the moon in the sky
Hey and nobody knows me
I can't fathom my stayin'
Shiver me timbers
'Cause I'm a-sailin' away
And the fog's liftin'
And the sand's shiftin'
I'm driftin' on out
Ol' Captain Ahab
He ain't got nothin' on me
So come and swallow me, follow me
I'm trav'lin' alone
Blue water's my daughter
'n I'm gonna skip like a stone
And I'm leavin' my family
Leavin' all my friends
My body's at home
But my heart's in the wind
Where the clouds are like headlines
Upon a new front page sky
And shiver me timbers
'Cause I'm a-sailin' away
My Christmas Tree here in Sydney... (Where it's 85 degrees today..)
Bah Humbug moment: There is a SWT, one of the office staff, that has Christmas music playing on her iPod... I was working on a printer in the tournament office and "I'll be home for Christmas" came up on her playlist.
SWT: "So, Big Guy, are you heading home from Christmas?"
TBG: "Sadly, no. 1 day to get home and 3 days to get back for work on the 26th? Thanks for reminding me of that... Want to give that knife another twist for me? Maybe a little salt for the wound?"
She was profoundly embarrassed for mentioning it. I think she though I was an Expat living in Melbourne, since that is where most of the temp staff is from.
At the steak joint just down the block from the hotel there is an excellent example of conspicuous consumption*...
That's right baby- 2.2 pounds of red meat, fat and gristle, just waiting to clog your arteries and make that morning trip to the loo a nightmare.
There is no possible reason on God's green Earth that ANYONE needs a steak that big. That's just foolishness! It's downright immoral, unethical and esthetically unpleasant.
Pieces of meat this size should be legislated out of existence, or at least access to cuts of steak this size should be limited to larger jungle carnivores and ogres.
Here's your steak dinner- It's our new cut- The Bloomberg.
Shut up and eat. Bon appetit!
TBG- ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒE
*They call it Man-O-War because it's roughly the same size as the racehorse of the same name.
I keep telling y'all to stay awake on the train...
“The guy got on with me at (the) Oak Park (station),” the victim said, requesting anonymity. “I wasn’t really paying attention.”
She sat down and started texting on her phone.
“Next stop (at Austin), he throws something in my face.”
I'm wondering if he had it with him the whole time, or did he fill it up just prior to the assault...
You could probably do it... No one is paying attention anyway.
The last thing I heard this morning before I shut the idjit box off and walked out the door was a teaser on a news program regarding the CT shooter's mother and her motivations.
"Authorities are looking into why A___ L___'s mother had this gun." showing a Bushmaster AR.
Why? Hell, why not?
I must have missed something- Are we now having to justify to the authorities the purchase of any legal item?
Why can anyone buy a Ferrari? They are only made to break speed laws...
That's the only possible reason to have one of those things...
Why can any honest and moral person have a Dodge Earthfucker pickup?
The only possible function of that vehicle is to waste gas and destroy the environment...
Police are at the scene of a drive-by shooting in Cherrybrook, in
Sydney's north-west, after a number of bullet holes were discovered in
the Franklin Rd duplex home about 7.20am this morning.
Numerous bullet holes were located in a motor vehicle and the front of a duplex premises.
There were occupants in the home at the time, however they were uninjured.
A resident, who did not wish to be named, said he heard a motorbike drive up to the Cherrybrook house around 5.30am.
"It came idling up, shot half a dozen rounds in a second and then took off at high speed," he said.
Damn. A half-dozen rounds in only one second.
Must be a machine gun.
But, isn't Australia a Gun-Free zone? Sure is, bucko... Except when some enterprising businessman buys Glocks in Germany and sends them down via the POST OFFICE.
And the cops find out about it by ACCIDENT?
Cracker, please.
The seizure of a pistol used in Sydney's drive-by shooting epidemic
led police to uncover a global firearms trafficking syndicate operating
out of a suburban Sydney post office, it will be alleged.
In a joint police operation yesterday,
officers converged on the Sylvania Waters post office - arresting the
franchisee. Police will allege the post office was the final destination
for shipments of Glock handguns - favoured by both Australian police
and criminals - which were manufactured in Austria and sent to Australia
via Germany.
The investigation, led by the NSW Firearms and
Organised Crime Squad, culminated yesterday with the arrest of three
people after several more shipments of weapons were covertly traced back
to Sydney by NSW police.
Twelve properties, including the post office, were raided as part of the investigation.
Up
to four search warrants were also executed by German authorities and a
NSW police officer in the town of Remscheid, through which the guns were
allegedly sent to gangs in Australia.
The syndicate's activities
were allegedly uncovered by NSW police inadvertently, following the
seizure of a Glock pistol in Sydney's southwest in January and the
arrest of its alleged owner.
The pistol - which was allegedly fired at a Sydney couple's Wiley Park
home - was one of the first guns taken off the streets by police during
Sydney's spate of drive-by shootings over the Christmas holiday period.
My favorite part was this graphic:
...Where it talks about parts being "entirely interchangeable with other models of Glocks"...
I was in Orlando a couple weeks ago and I came across a food truck...
Now, in addition to 'Location, location, location", a food truck needs to have a catchy name...
Shut Up and Eat
The Shrimp Pimp
Greasy Weiner
Great Balls on Tires
And my personal favorite: Me So Hungry
But- this joint in O-Town...
Someone should kick the snot out of anyone who names a food truck "Restaurant on Wheels".
He couldn't spend 10 minutes on the interweb and come up with something a little more catchy?
Fortunately I'm in an environment populated with complete strangers.
I'v never met any of these people before and none of them know about my position on guns and gun control.
I had at least 6 people ask my opinion of the Newtown tragedy and have I tried to be non-committal about it, preferring not to argue about guns, mental health issues or politics.
I do, however want to make a point...
Of course there will be a knee-jerk reaction to the tragedy. (Of course, that's what we do!That's why we have the TSA... And look how that is working out.)
Feinstein will introduce her new "assault weapon" ban, which, in order to make politicians feel good about themselves, might actually pass regardless of overwhelming popular opinion. (Remember Obamacare?)
It's the nose of the camel, yall....
First, no new machine guns... they were banned in '68. Next new "assault weapon" transfers... (Oh no...it's not about confiscation! You can keep your existing guns. Quote Feinstein: "It will ban the sale, the transfer, the importation and the possession. Not retroactively but prospectively.")
This is complete and utter bullshit. Feinstein is not
about gun control, she's about people control.
Then, when some individual with untreated/ignored mental health issues sources a pre-ban weapon and "clips" and shoots up ANOTHER gun-free zone, the hand wringing will begin again... ZOMG! DO SOMETHING! Ban ALL semi-automatic rifles. Actually, let's "regulate" all semiautomatic weapons into non-existence.
Next - all military designed weapons... (Remember those 5-shot bolt-action Mosins? Guess what they are?)
Now let's regulate any concealable weapon...
Mass murder by gunfire will continue... So the next hue and cry will be confiscation.
Take them all away.
And even if they actually TRY to do that (and good luck and getting that effort underway...)
Guess what... Now you still have mentally ill individuals and criminals roaming the streets- most likely still armed, and law abiding folks will have no way to protect themselves.
So, Charles, Dianne, Mike... Your ideas and policies murdered those
children. How do you feel about that? Are you proud? Will you brag
about the laws in Connecticut that were identical to the '94-'04 AWB?
Will you point out, with pride, how a not-even-ephemeral line on the
ground banned firearms from entering the school?
Making things illegal (or MORE illegal) doesn't really solve the problem...
If that was the case, then once we pass laws outlawing (some) narcotics for recreational use, we shouldn't have a drug problem. There sure as hell should be a "war on drugs" since we made them illegal and all...
We should be exceptionally safe on the highways, since DUI is illegal and excessively careless operation (speeding, aggressive driving) is against the law too.
Hell.. Why do we even have police? Once you outlaw something- doesn't the problem go away?
A 20 year-old had a couple of handguns (illegal). And, depending on the
press report, had an assault weapon (illegal), automatic rifle
(illegal), or machine gun (illegal). Shot his mom in the face (illegal).
Stole his mom’s vehicle (illegal). Transported the gun in the vehicle
(illegal) within 1,000 feet of a school (illegal). Carried it onto
school property (illegal). Broke and entered (illegal). Carried a gun in
a school (illegal). Discharged a firearm (illegal). Shot at people
(illegal). Killed some people (illegal). Killed himself (not sure if
illegal).
Look- the problem is Progressives who have
destroyed the family, education, cultural and social mores in their
efforts to control the population, and to make us a compliant Socialist
nation. Attacking the symptoms is easy. Attacking the root causes of
these killings is very difficult. Effective solutions would require
setting limits and boundaries in a child's life, supporting families,
helping people become self sufficient, and a complete cessation of
efforts to blame everything on inanimate objects!
What about the issue with the mentally ill?
That's something they ignore/avoid as all costs.
From the Gateway Pundit:
Connecticut is one of only SIX states in the U.S. that doesn’t have
a type of “assisted outpatient treatment” (AOT) law (sometimes referred
to as “involuntary outpatient treatment”). There’s no one standard for
these types of laws, but (roughly speaking) these are laws that allow
for people with mental illness to be forcibly treated BEFORE they commit
a serious crime. Whereas previous legal standards held that the
mentally ill cannot be institutionalized or medicated until they harm
someone or themselves, or until they express an immediate intent to do
so, AOT laws (again, roughly speaking) allow for preventative institutionalization
or forced medication (I highly recommend reading the data cited in the
link I provided in this paragraph, especially regarding what is known as
“first episode psychosis”).
AOT laws vary state-by-state, and often bear the name of a person
murdered by an untreated mentally ill person (“Kendra’s Law” in New
York, “Laura’s Law” in California, etc.). Earlier this year, Connecticut considered passing an AOT law (and a weak one, at that), and it failed, due to protests from “civil liberties” groups.
Have you read what the perpetrator's Mom was going through with this kid?
Oh well...
Most of you won't read all the way through this, but I needed to write it anyway...
I needed to vent, and if I did it at the event site, I would probably be home by Christmas.
Hmmmm...
It takes some effort to come up with timely, relevant, entertaining and worthwhile content on a regular basis. I really don't know how some 'bloggers do it.
For about the last 6 to 8 months, my muse has pretty much abandoned me...
Do you have a firearm that you have purchased for home protection, but are not comfortable with your ability to safely maintain, load and fire it?
Uncle Jay would be glad to help.
If you've never shot a firearm or would like an introduction into shooting sports, just let me know.
I can arrange range time and can give you practical assistance in learning about guns, or help you with your personal protection firearm.
Always remember the 5 rules:
1. Always treat a firearms as if it is loaded.
2. Never point a firearm at anyone or anything that you do not intend to kill or destroy.
3. Keep your finger off the trigger until you are ready to shoot.
4. Know your target and what is beyond the target.
5. Don't be a dick.
You can violate one of the rules and you might survive; If you break two of the rules, someone could be hurt or killed.
Violate the 5th rule and the person hurt or killed will probably be you.
Always remember: You are personally responsible for anything that happens while a gun is in your hands.
Ex Libiris
People who should have better judgement than to be following a subversive bastard like Yours Truly
