I love a good headline...

Four women finger NY subway perv

Story here.

Sometimes they just write themselves...

Amazing, out.

Quote of week (so far)...

After a tedious and tiresome converstaion in my office:

"Next time you come to talk to me, bring duct tape."

Famous.

TBG out-

One more thing...

I forgot the most memorable quip of the night.

We were talking of something inane-
Doubtless it was an like how much vodka to put in a Rum & Coke, or something very much like that...

Mark says "Well...You have to draw the line somewhere. Sometimes, the line is just curved..."

Truer words have never been spoken.

Amazing, out.

Captain's Orders

You can't teach an Old Dog new tricks...
Hence, I will never learn that going out drinking with Mark is folly beyond reckoning...
Worse- doing it 2 nights in a row is a recipe for disaster.

Some number of you Constant Readers of L2UJ might know that Thursday was our company All-Employee meeting. A twice-yearly shindig where we are informed of company news and policy changes, and othen stuff... Sometimes it's good- Event recaps and photo slide shows- and sometimes, well, not so much.
Tom Morgan.
That's all I should have to say to illustrate that point.

Anyway- After the meeting we adjourned to The Lemon Bar and proceeded to make a large dent in the supply of Captain Morgan in Neptune Beach.

I bailed around 8:45 and crept home...
Mark, Chris Hayes, Jamie Odum and Eric the New Guy, along with our guest drinker Tony "T-Bone" Surmonte stayed behind... Drinking.
I was home and adrift in the arms of Morpheus as they went from Lemon Bar, to Sliders, to The Ritz... Around 1:00 or 1:30 am Mark remembered that was a school night, so to speak... Chris, Jamie and Eric were taking Friday off... Mark, however, had to work, as did I.
I saw Mark early on Friday... Not pretty. He berated me for abandoning the effort so early... As I have told him many times-
"When you're dumb, ya gotta be tough."
I haven't lived this long without knowing when to cut and run...He needs to hear the branch creak every once in a while.

Last night I got a call...

"Hey man. Get down here to 11 South. I have someone I want you to meet."
Apparently he had met two girls and had been wowing them with his tales of drinking and debauchery in Italy and somehow had painted a picture of Yours Truly that was larger that life, if that's possible.
I came down to meet said flowers of feminity...

(Yes, I know the picture is a bit fuzzy... So was I, at the time... The Captain will do that to you...)
Cute, intelligent ladies... Didn't know why they'd be hanging out with Spongemark...

We drank for a bit longer, and of course I dazzled them with my wit and charm...
Here's where Mark went wrong...
They were married...
One of the girls' husbands showed up, and took her away from Mark's endless supply of Cosmopolitans, and, well... I took the other one home.
Heh.

Mark? He remained at the bar, chitchatting with some friend of Jim Ingalls and sipping a drink made with sour grapes...

Famous!

DUI Sweep in Duval County this weekend...

I just got this e-mail...

All,

I have it on good authority that JSO is importing DUI squads to Duval County this Friday to have a major enforcement action. Kindly share this with anyone who will be out and thinkin of drinkin.

Hmmm.

Makes me want to go out driving and drinking...

Who wants to come run the video camera whilst the po-lice men

"Rodney King" me for DUI?

Even better- hang out for several hours at the Ritz, drinking nothing but

Red Bull, then "stagger" out to the car, making a big show of trying to

find the keys (dropping them several times) and finally start the car and

sit with it running for several minutes... Then slowly drive off.

When they finally pull me over, I'll tell them I was the designated decoy for the 8

people I was drinking with tonite... Heh.

I guess I'll still need someone to run the video camera.
Any volunteers?

Amazing out-

Questions, answers and comments

Augusta Edition

1. No...I don't have any tickets.
2. We're using {making quote motions with fingers a la Austin Powers} "lasers".
3. No. No idea.
4. Ok, yes then.
5. If you don't charge your golf cart at night, you can't use it the next day. Q.E.D.
6. We're not leaving the house. The traffic is too bad to go to dinner anywhere.
7. No. I have not gone to the Hooters here in Augusta yet.
8. I can't talk about it.
9. No, really. I can't talk about it.
10. Hole 3 to Security, we have a code 99. Oh, never mind.
11. Oh no, not pimento cheese again...
12. Hole 2 to Base... Where is the "stun" setting on this laser?
13. What do you mean, you forgot your credential? It's easier to get in the White House without a credential than Augusta National.
14. Hole 9, Hole 9... Where are you?
15. Mark, can you check on hole 9?
16. If I see one more pimento cheese sandwich....
17. No problem Hole 17, I'll bring you your clipboard. And some ice for your eye.
18. We have too many chiefs and not enough roosters. (Thanx Phil)
19. If you're afraid of getting struck by lightning, I have some 1-irons that you can hold over your heads...
20. There are no more. There won't be any more. Ever.
21. We're screwed. (Athens legacy FGA)
22. Can we get pizza delivered to hole 17?
23. Hole 5 to base... We have to move the laser, again.
24. Can you send this document by intercourse mail? Hmmm... That didn't sound right...
25. We're getting our full 80% chance of rain for 60% of the day...

Famous, out-

A Nice Golf Course Webcam

Tired of looking at the pic of the binding of the Torino Media Guide?
How about something new?
The Webcam is back on line...

Fun on the menu, Augusta style...

At A Nice Golf Course like the one here, they are renown for some of the food available during the tournament.The egg salad is pretty good, and some people are enamored of the pimento cheese sandwiches...
They have ham & cheese on rye, and turkey, tuna salad, barbeque, and other goodies...
We have found, however, the best sandwich available is a is actually a combo-
Take one of the chicken filet sandwiches and a club sandwich,


and remove the filet, take the ham, turkey and cheese out of the club sandwiches,

and put them atop the chicken filet.

If you are in a position that has a microwave in the vicinity, put your chicken/ham/cheese assembly in and nuke it for 20 seconds or, if you own a Blue Toaster, put it on the dashboard for a hour or so in the hot Georgia sun...

Voila! An ANGC Cordon Bleu.

Famous, out-

Fan mail, again.

Keep those cards and letters coming...

Sombrero Night - Redux

Things have been progressing nicely here at A Nice Golf Course...
All out equipment is set up, all of the prep work is done, and today (Monday) is our first day of practice rounds.
I had all of my volunteers show up yesterday evening for orientation, and it looks like most of them are veterans from last year. About 30 out of 35 are returnees- makes it good for me in that we won't have to do alot of initial training and they are fairly familiar with the software we use.
We had a little refresher training last night, and some more training for the noobs this morning...

I had a little visitor show up as I was trying to put our carts on the chargers last night.

A tiny little corn snake was trying to help... Cute little guy...

So, since all has been going so well, Spongemark decided it was time for part two of Sombrero night.
Now- keep in mind that between the last Sombrero night (Wed last week) and Last night (Sunday), Mark was also at Veracruz on Saturday night. (Are you getting the impression that Mark likes tequila? Good. You're on the right track.)

Ok... So, originally we were going to my favorite purveyor of chicken wings, but it was so crowded we had to bail on it and go to Veracruz...
And once again, there were shots on the table before we had placed our orders for dinner...


Two shots? Mark was trying to make a case that since I didn't come out and play on Saturday night, I needed to drink double shots.
And I don't know why Jamie was so happy about his pitcher of watered down Margaritas...

Question:
Susan has to separate out her M&Ms into piles of similar colors before eating them...

Could this behavior be construed as Obsessive/Compulsive or just racist?



And our moment of Zen every morning:

(Click picture for larger view)
We have to Stop and wiggle with it every morning on the way to work.
Starts the day off right.

Your cards and letters.

I keep getting fan mail...

Sometimes people leave comments in regards to a topic or picture. That's cool...
Sometimes I get comments in an e-mail sent directly to me instead. This, too, is cool.
But if I get e-mail, then I have to respond, and since the answer might be of interest to all, I'll just post some of the answers here...

To DRG:
Yeah. The food was OK... Just not what we were expecting for Italy...
And yes, the potato skins looked like roadkill.

To HHT:
Her name was Claire, and even if I had her e-mail address and phone number, I wouldn't give it to you. For free.

To LAW:
Yes, Mark is a funny guy, quick with witty repartee and pretty much everything else too.

To KR:
Yeah. Sorry. Mark got tired of being on the webcam.

To GS, et al:
Yes, I look older, younger, grayer, lighter, heavier, more angry, taller and shorter with my hair cut.
THIS IS WHY I ONLY DO IT ONCE A YEAR.

To RD:
"Physalia" is my car. An Eternal Blue Pearl Honda Element... Often referred to by others as "The blue toaster."

Re: The pic of the door of my office.
(In reply to several people)

1. The pic is now a link to a bigger version. Click on it to see more detail.

2. The top sign reads "Some people are alive simply because it is against the law for me to kill them." (Some of you will do well to remember this...)

3. The one in the middle reads "Free Beatings Today - For more info, please annoy the ogre sitting at the desk within."

4. The pic on the upper left is Hunter when she was about 4, dressed as a Dalamation for Halloween, along with her role model.

5. The partially obscured newspaper clipping was a headline from a Brisbane newspaper that reads "It's OK to beat the kids."

6. The pic on the lower right (above the fish) is from Hawaii. The girl on the left is Geri Lavin and the one on the right is Janine Thomas.
No, you don't know them.
No, you can have their contact info.

7. The No Fish pic is for Marco. Originally posted on the microwave oven outside my office.
(Marco likes microwaved canned tunafish for lunch. Which means the stench of hot tuna pervades the office for the next 45 minutes.)

8. The pic of the ogre under the stairs (lower left) was from Cleveland, as I was running cables in the arena. You haven't lived until you've been down in the muck and mire that collects under the seats in an arena like the Gund...

Famous out-

Sombrero Night & the Seven Warning Signs

Well... We made it.
And just in time for Sombrero night!

As we were on the road Jamie mentioned we might make it in time for Sombrero night... I told him I'd talked to Mark and SN was scheduled for Thursday. Nope- tonite.
Hmmm...
We got Mark on the phone and found out they'd re-rescheduled it for Wednesday night. Lovely- a 5 hour drive to be concluded with heavy tequila consumption.

We went to the course and dropped off our equipment as they guys were finishing up for the day. I took Jamie over to the house where he was staying, then I went to my place to wait for the others to come home and get ready to go out...
Mitch (the Regulator) and Mike (Davis, from California) arrived shortly thereafter and we all went over to Veracruz. The three of us got a table for 8 and started with the Wednesday drink special -
Jumbo Margaritas- $4.50. Hoo Ha!
Mark, Jon, Jamie, Eric & Robert arrived minutes later and after they ordered drinks Mark threw down the gauntlet...The first round of shots was on the table before we had ordered our meal.
(This, in case you aren't aware, is one of the "7 Danger Signs of IDS" See below.)

It should be obvious that things would be going from bad to much worse in short order.
The annual celebration is referred to as Sombrero Night because at some random point in the evening, we would begin to pull the decorative sombreros off the walls and wear them...
(Pictures courtesy of Eric Wisdom's cell phone.)


Mitch, Mark & empties.


Jamie Odum and Mark, "Smile, you gringo bastard."


"And tonight the role of Dirty Sanchez will be performed by Eric Wisdom"

For those who may be worrying, Mark, Mitch and Yours Truly were the only real drinkers... The other 5 attendees were our designated drivers...
A good time was had by all, and there was no invocation of the "Lynch Procedure",
where someone in the party has to call Rallis to have him come down to the local hoosgow and bail us out for some legal infraction.

The next morning was very subdued... All the window shades were drawn and everyone spoke in whispered tones... By 4 or 5 PM we were mostly recovered and ready to go out again...
I chose the better part of valor... I took Physalia over to the self service car wash and scrubbed 300 miles of bugs off the grill of the blue toaster.
I'm a wild man.

More fun and debauchery tonight...

-------------------------

The seven warning signs of IDS
(There are others, these are the most prevalent)

1. Having a company policy named after you.
2. Shots before dinner
3. Shots before breakfast
4. Shots instead of dinner or breakfast
5. Talking to AND getting answered by inanimate objects
6. Support for the "LPGA Jihad"
   
7. Being on a first-name basis with airline flight crews

Famous! out.

Getting ready for my next gig & New contest.

Preparing to get on the road for my next job...

Based on the client's propensity for secretiveness, I really can't come out and just say where it is, or what the work I'm doing is, but let's just say I'm working at "A Nice Golf Course"...

Anyway- Heading out tomorrow (the 29th)... Physalia will be loaded to the gills with equipment, luggage and 2 ogres... I'm giving Jamie Odom a ride- he's part of my support crew for the project.

Mark Moore- My partner in crime in Italy is on site at "A Nice Golf Course", too, but only for a little while. Lucky bastard is leaving early to attend a wedding. He sent me a message yesterday about me missing out on Sombrero Night, which I think is some kind of celebration at the local Tex-Mex beanery...
Last year we drank tequila in prodigious porportions- This year promises to be a repeat, since when I said I couldn't make it for the original schedule, they moved Sombrero Night to Thursday. Ho Ha!
Tequila y baile toda la noche con las muchachas!

So...

Mark was whining today about a service he'd requested months ago and said service was not completed. At a regualr event, this would not be suprising, but at A Nice Golf Course, it kinda is. They usually don't drop the ball, so to speak.
I'm so used to it (incomplete service orders) that it doesn't faze me anymore.
I sent him the usual reply "IDS=Isn't Done, Sorry"... He didn't see the humor.
The boy is too much of a prefectionist. (Not anal retentive or OCD, but shit like this really puts a twist in his knickers.)
Then again, he's only worked one Olympics event... The embodiment of things not being ready for prime-time... Just wait 'til Beijing. Heh.

A task for you, my evil minions...
Bend your thoughts to coming up with a new acronym for the company...
For years we have always used "IDS=I Don't Sleep" to reflect the concept of long hours and the moments of panic that make up a typical event...

I was going to post a list to be filled out on the door to my office, but I think it would just get lost in the background noise...


So...

Let's see what y'all come up with...

IDS =

I Don't Sleep

Idiots Drinking & Singing ('97 US Open)

Isn't Done, Sorry

Idiots Doing Sports

...


Famous, out-

Friendly warning

Just some advice:

Don't take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

I'm just saying....

Famous, out-

Fresh Blood

One of our guys on the LPGA event staff,(a/k/a The LPGA Carneys) also has a site up...
He's been shooting quite a few pics from some of his events, and he has a pretty nice site... Definitely worth a peek- if only to see the pics that he took in Hawaii.

Pay him a visit- Tell him The Big Guy sent you...

http://www.thewrongway.com

Tasty stuff, Zack!

Famous, out-

And the hits just keep on coming...

(For some odd reason, most questions are preceeded by the word "wow".)
(or "mom" or "EOE" or "303". Long story, don't ask.)

17. Wow. Did you know you the gray in your hair is really noticable now?

18. Wow. Haircut? Or in your case, a shearing?

19. Wow. You know, your head looks much smaller now.

20. Man. You gonna start wearing a hat?

21. Are you less "amazing" now, just like Samson was after his haircut?

Famous out-

Dumb questions II

14. Man, did you lose a bet?

15. Wow. I bet that hurt.

16. When you got your haircut did they cut enough off to donate?

Keep em coming...


Amazing the haircut, out-

Dumb questions.

1. Did you get a haircut?

2. Wow. What happened?

3. How many people did it take to hold you down?

4. What happened to your hair?

5. Where's your hair.

6. I know you from somewhere... Don't tell me...

7. Wow. Who are you?

8. Wow. The yearly chop.

9. Man. Did you get arrested?

10. Wow. Must be springtime.

11. Shedding?

12. Is it Thursday?

13. Wow. Did they charge you by the pound or by the yard?

14. There is no 14, yet. But the day is young...

Famous the haircut, out-

Torino Wrap

"Welcome back my friends, to the show that never ends
We’re so glad you could attend-
Come inside! come inside!"
-Emerson Lake & Palmer - Karn Evil 9


Just a quick review and farewell to all of our friends in Italy and elsewhere...

In Sauze d'Oulx & Bardonecchia

The crew at Paddy McGinty's
Orlando, Alex, our favorite bartender whose name I never learned,
Amy, "H" (The fixer), Gio (The Vandal), DJ Danny and Kaz (Keep 'em warm...)...


The good folks at Queens Lounge-
Alfredo, Amy (The OTHER Amy), Nichie and Julia (Have a chips...)

At Sugo's- Mauritzio & Tattoo...
The best pasta in the Suza Valley.

Customers & People
The English girl who tried to ride me like a horse,
as her boyfriend was passed out at the table
during the trivia contest.

The dude who followed me back to the hotel because he was sure
I had been hitting on his girlfriend.

The Russian girl who tried an assualt on the north face,
as I tried to make it across the dancefloor at Osteria Vagabondi.

Katie- Our waitress at Debili, who showed up at Paddy's
very late at night, very inebriated, very often.

And at Melezet- Eric Angstadt-Torres from Atos, Nicola (at OVR) and
of course Omega Girl - Talar, and their flawless crew that provided results!

And all the Japanese...
(The Japanese? Those sandal-wearing goldfish tenders...)

At NBC (BDY)
Bruce, Partick, Ivan (Bill Murray)
Mike, Harvey A, Taz, LJ, Jeff the (other) viking, Carrie,
The Talent- Pat, Tina, Mark S, Todd and Bettina from Dew Tour.
Super Dave Osbourne, Lisa, Charlie, JT,
and Annette, our Graphics crews...

In SDO at FR- Mike, Billy & Jeff-
Plus the runners- Simone, Andrea, Elena & Luca...
Y'all were the best!

At the IBC in Torino-
TJ- who I thought had learned his lesson in Athens, back for another
round of night shifts and bad local food.
(At least no pork sushi this time, eh TJ?)

Byron- Audio tech par excellance- another Athens veteran.

Craig Lau- our man at NBC. We run away kicking and screaming, and he just keeps dragging us back...

And our crew-

In Torino-
Daryl "Ned Flanders" Carson
Mitch "The Regulator" Mitchell
Susan "Don't touch the hair" Walker
Bob "The Apostle" Lanham

In Sestriere
Stass "The Codemonkey" Iordanov
Lacey "Rookie" Koerner
"Smilin' Dave" Kananen

In Sauze d'Oulx
Mark "Spongemark Squarehands" Moore

In Jacksonville
Paul "Kapusta" Podkulski
John "Croc" Sarmie
"Dr. Rob" Ayres
David "Special K" Kazebee

Ned Manchu sez:

See you on the Great Wall - Bejing 2008!

Famous the Technician out-

It has been a year now...

"Hey boy, you need a haircut. You look like a chrysanthemum."

Last time I got a haircut I was in Orange, California.
Working the challenger tennis event at Ridgeline Country Club
up in Orange Park- outside Anaheim Hills.

Do you think it is getting a little long?


Just as a point of reference, I'm the one in the back, with the blue jacket.
The other blonde is Tina Dixon, the girl who did the athlete interviews for snowboarding on NBC.

Webcam

(No, I don't have new time-shifting technology. By post-dating
the message, it will keep the webcam link at the top of the 'blog.)

More random Olympic views.

Saturday Feb 25-

I got to go skiing...
It had been snowing for almost 3 days straight. I rented skis and boots and headed for the slopes above Sauze d'Oulx.

Visibility was horrible


My right leg only wanted to ski for a half day, though.
Around 1:00 my right calf siezed up... I spent the rest of the day and most of the night with a Lidocaine patch on it to relieve the pain...

Working on my brain freeze.


Up on the mountain there was a little cafe...

...with porno on the menu.


Speaking of menus...

How have people been ordering their steaks that prompted this little nugget?

At the broadcast compound in Bardonecchia, a big dog was staking out the catering tent.

"No one gets breakfast until I see some bacon and hash browns in a doggiebowl."


He takes up the entire entrance way to the tent.

On another note...

Brain Socks... for smart feet.

By popular request... Riberi Media Village.

Tell me this doesn't look like an mental institution.

Now, being from Florida, I didn't know about the dangers of falling ice...

After a heavy snowfall the snow and ice builds up...

Then it begins to slide off...

If you slam the door of the cabine, there is an excellent chance of getting hit by a big (heavy, sharp) chunk of ice.

Sometimes they are incredibly intricate, and dangerous since the convoluted design makes for unpredictable breakage.

Note to self- don't stand under the big sharp ice-stuff.

Famous out-

Food fun, Olympic Style

Now, you would think that in a country that is known for it's cuisine and wines they they would pull out all the stops when they are in the world's spotlight...
Sadly, either they have been pulling the wool over our eyes for years, or they just don't give a crap.

I'm not sure what I was expecting...
First, I'm not a big fan of Italian food to begin with.
True- I make a mean lasagna, and I enjoy the occasional meal at Carrabbas, but by and large, I'll take barbeque or chicken wings over pasta and red sauce any day.
Second, I'm not sure the Piedmont (Northwest Italy) is exactly known for it's gastronomic delights as much as southern Italy.
What I can tell you is that most non-catered meals have been a relative disappointment when it comes to flavor and content. As for catered meals, that is a completely different kettle of fish...or chicken, and we'll get to that in just a minute.

Restaurant food, especially in Sauze d'Oulx and Torino, has been a disappointment. I think the guy that knew where the garlic was growing died and didn't tell anyone where the stash was... All the food has been pretty bland- with one notable exception.
A restaurant called Sugo's down in Sauze d'Oulx has been a treat every time we have been there. They specialize in two things, Bruschetta and Pasta. And because they concentrate on that, thay have it down to a science. They had 15 or so variations of bruschetta with differing combinations of parma ham, spek ham, mozzarella, gorgonzola, walnuts, cream, olives, tomato, and othe savories. The pasta is served family style- Big pots or dished piled high with different types of pasta. We tried a penne with beef, garlic and peppers that was just fantastic. Another one we tried was a tagliatelle with wild boar meat, garlic and chilis. Really an excellent choice. The guy that runs the place, Mauritzio (Maurice, or Furgeson, as I called him) is always willing to make a change or exception since the pasta is cooked fresh when you order... So if you wanted the wild boar sauce on farfalle instead of tagliatelle, it is no problem.

Other places have been very hit-or-miss...
Right next door to Suga is a place called del Borgo... Great cream of tomato soup- but the mushroom soup was poor. I expected more from their pizza, as it had come highly recommended. Alas, the two different evenings we went there, I was not exactly carried away. The best thing there was a chili oil we got them to bring in order to liven up our pizzas. The scoville rating wasn't very high on it, but it there was some good flavor to it.

Miraviello is right next to the hotel, they specialize in crepes, but the ones we tried were overcooked, or the ingredients were overpowering... Mark had a crepe with mozz, gorgonzola and an olive tapanade that was just overpowering... My Brie & Speck was ok, but very light on ingredients.

Godfather's restaurant was a disappointment- after we made our choices the owner came over to our table and tried to change everyone's mind... Mark & Jeff wanted pizzas, Mike & I wanted ribs. Il Padrino came over to push his pasta trio... ravioli, lasagana, and penne. "It is the best in Italy."
It's the best because it was cheap and already cooked... All he has to do is serve it, so it is a low cost-per-serving. A winner when it comes to the bottom line.
Well, he was able to sway Mark and Mike, and in the end they were really disappointed about it. I ordered the ribs, and they brought a t-bone steak that was still bleeding (more than normal). I sent it back and asked for my ribs, and they were a sad study in bovine anatomy. To say it was all flavorless would be an undestatement...
and to cap it off- this was the place that wouldn't serve coffee after our meal..."I don't serve coffee", the owner said, "because I don't like coffee."
How does this guy stay in business?

Paddy McGinty's is the Irish bar in Sauze. Fortuitously located directly across from our hotel, it is one of the "crawling distance" bars that, even better, carries Captain Morgans Rum.
On a sign outside they tout their various cuisine... Thai, Indian, Mexican, Chinese...
It is somewhat misleading... Just because you carry frozen spring rolls, that doesn't mean you are serving Thai. Ditto for Fajitas (especially curry chicken fajitas) as the height of Mexican food.
Chinese... I don't remember what the Chinese dish was, but I'm sure it was very marginal.
Now, truth be told, I had the BBQ ribs and they pretty tasty. And Ivan the GE Guy had a t-bone that was outrageous. But...
On the other hand, there is something to be said for truth in advertising.
On the menu they have potato skins...
The menu reads "Deep fried... Hell.. Here, you read it...

Look there... Fried potato skins, cheese, bacon bits.

Now- I'm thinking a TGiFridays kinds thing...

What came to the table, however. was a bit of surprise.


Does this look like deep-fried potato skins to you?

Overall, so far the food has been disappointing.

Want to make a billion dollars?
Open a Chinese restaurant in Sauze d'Oulx.
And bring some garlic.

Now- Apart from the slice of hell that is the local restaurant scene, the catered food here is atrocious.
Even worse tasting, food that is supposed to be warm or hot is cold, the cold food is hot, things are either burnt or raw, and are almost universally bad.
I believe the best food I had was at the IBC (International Broadcast Center) in Torino for breakfast one morning... They were making pancakes with Canadian maple syrup. By far the best meal I have had here.
And don't get me started on the BBQ spare ribs that were covered in a nice marinara instead of BBQ sauce.
Sad, really.

The other bizarre thing is the catering crew they have at the venues (BDY and SDO at least) are world-class when it comes to playing with food. As they stand there waiting to slop a scoop of cold scrambled eggs on your plate, they are continuously moving the food around the chafing dish. Scoop scoop, scrape scrape, dig dig... And give them a pliable media like mashed potatoes and they start ot get creative. A sculpture of the NBC peacock in macaroni & cheese, the Olympic rings in scalloped potatoes.
One guy at SDO is a real winner... He'll capture one of the pressed-and-formed pork cutlets with his tongs, then suspend it from one corner, gently shaking it until the piece breaks off, then he eats the little piece. Truly bizarre.

There have been several articles on how bad the food is here...
From a piece on CNN.com...

-CNN Story-

...Russian bobsledder Nadezda Orlova didn't need words to describe what she thought of the food -- she just gave a thumbs down.
Her physiotherapist, Alexander Kluykov, said he feared the food could affect Orlova's performance.
"She wants to eat, but she can't," he said. "When you eat something it must taste of something, it must smell of something."
In the prefabricated tent that houses the cafeteria, American skier Ted Ligety, who won gold in the combined, left a plate of pasta with tomato sauce half finished on the eve of the giant slalom.
"The food here is actually not so good," he said. "The highlight this week is that they installed a machine for ice-cream bars."


The really telling comment from this piece...

Not everyone was critical of the cooking.
"I think the food is good, especially the Chinese food," said Polish bobsledder Mariusz Latkowski.
Then he added: "But I'm sad there isn't a McDonald's here."
(Usually there is a huge McDonalds in every Olympic Village.)

This piece is actually on the food in the athlete's dining rooms in the Olympic Villages, so I can tell you that the stuff for us production peons is exponentially worse.

The games are drawing to a close. Time to start branching out.
There has to be good food somewhere.

Hungry the Jay out-

Taken Out of Context - Continued.

A real winner from Paddy McGinty's Pub last night.

"That's the biggest piece of meat I have seen in Italy. "

Famous.


Amazing out-

Someone, please just put a bullet in me now...

Let me just give you the items, and you can fill in the scathing commentary.

• Riberi... Mental hospital part due.
• IBC...Fascisti Mag & Bag guys.
• NBC Commissary - E.Coli Cafe; Pasta, or is it PASTE-a?
• Riding the buses - taking a different route every time. 10 minutes or 45, for a 2km trip.
• Curling - Hours and hours and hours of curling.
• Ribs for dinner - The red sauce was marinara, not barbeque...
• More curling
• Back to Riberi - 8:00am call to go back to the Sauze d'Oulx.
• 90 minutes to the Mountains- 60 minutes of morning traffic.
  (And everyone knows how much I hate traffic!)
• Scaring the driver with my snoring as I slept in the car on the way out to Sauze.

More out-of-context quotes:

"The NBC show has begun. We don't need no stinking athletes."

"Geez- I hope the webcam didn't catch that..."

"In order to get information, one must endure the bullshit."

"What kind of winter sport that involves snow gets delayed because of snow?"

"We call that place the LSA... Less Safe Area. It is an area with restaurants and pubs very nice, and low price. But people, they are not so nice.
So just pay more care in the LSA. In night time, consider to cross the LSA never alone."

IDS Employee going to McDonalds in IBC:
(Name withheld to protect identity. We'll just call her "Security Guard Killer")
SGK: I would like some fries, please.
McDonald: Would you like fries with that?

Amazing out-

Olympics Gallery

I've posted part of the Olympics Gallery.

Click the the pic to view...

Famous out-

Migration

Well...
I've made a temporary move from Sauze d'Oulx down to Torino. Definitely a step down. I'm staying at the Riberi Media Village...
(Riberi, Italian for "Mental Hospital built on toxic waste dump".)

I'm not saying the rooms are small, but I have to step out in the hall to change my mind. Even the mice are hunch-backed. All those old Henny Youngman lines...

The IBC isn't so bad.. the food is OK, and I keep running into people I know from NBC (the NBA days, Athens, etc) so that aspect is enjoyable. But I kinda miss the folks up in Sauze...

I'll be here a few days to give the guys here in town a couple days off, then I head back up to the mountains for the last couple Snowboard events (Parallel Giant Slalom) and to breakdown the equipment.

A few pics from Sauze...

From my window at the hotel in Sauze d'Oulx

Looking up the street.

And looking back down...


A timberwolf walking down the street in front of the hotel.

Please do not feed the wolf. (Picture courtesy of Spongemark Squarehands)


I did get one good pic from last night downtown near Piazza Vittorio Emanuelle...

One of the national promotional "houses" on the river Po. Not sure what the big blue place up on the hill is yet...

Taken out of context, part 2.

"One drunk girl and fifty guys does not constitute a strip club."

"Oh. That is terrible. Have a chips."

"That shiny one is going to be tough to get down..."

"But, I pulled down my pants for you!!"

"What is that new IRM code for Curling - FOA?"
"Falls On Ass... It's unofficial, of course."
"...Let's see if she goes down again."

Day # 7

Lucky 7?

(Snowboard spoiler omitted)

Oh well...

I have some pics and some out-of-context quotes for you to mull over...

In Sauze d'Oulx...

Here's your sign, Mark...

Stass is one sleepy codemonkey.

Snoozing between the Qualifiers and the Finals

There would never be price gouging at the Olympics.

For $1.80, that better be one tasty candy bar.

My stash of cold drinks.

Labels are important so no one grabs your stuff...


Quotes:

"We don't know dogs, we just shoot them."

"Don't let the facts get in the way of a good show, Billy."

"Is that clean, or is it clean-clean?"

"I looked into their eyes and do you know what I saw? The smell of defeat."

"Any Idiot can face a crisis; it is this day-to-day living that wears you out."

"I'd explain it to you, but your brain would explode."

"But I don't live in Sez-tree-air. I live in Sow-zay-dooks-ee..."


Amazing out-

Random Olympic Views - Day 6.

Just some pics...


IDS Breakfast... Water, Marmite, Clartyne, Espresso, and a flask of Capt. Morgan.


Standing in line at 5:30 AM, waiting to go through Mag & Bag.


Snowing harder in Bardonecchia before the competition starts.


What the well-dressed spotty dog is wearing this season.
A very sweet young dalmation in Sauze d'Oulx...


The view from the door of my trailer.