Oh. You want to play f*ck -f*ck?

We can play fuck-fuck.
As a matter of fact, we can play South Louisiana fuck-fuck, as Pete would say.
The TSA continues to find new and even more irritating ways to inconvenience the traveling public...
This morning I was passing through Houston (Hi Belle! Hi KX59!) and as I boarding my continuing flight I got pulled aside by two TSA agents for a surprise random inspection...
'Pulled aside' quite literally...
One agent grabbed at my bag as I passed by, throwing me off balance as I tried to pass their makeshift checkpoint.

TSA bag grabber: "Hey. I gotta check your bag."

Wrong. How about a little courtesy and decorum? How about an 'excuse me'?
I decide to have a little fun with this...
The spot where they set up their inspection table was a pinch-point, and when they stopped me, it stopped all progress. With the other passengers piling up behind me I unslung my bag from my shoulder and put it on the table.
Bag Grabber reached for it with his blue-gloved paws, but I pulled it back.

Yours Truly: "Go change your gloves first."
TSABG: "What?"

People start to squeeze by, but quite a few are watching.

YT: "You've been pawing through people's dirty underwear- change your gloves before you touch my stuff."

He gaped like a mackerel for a second then patted down his pockets, looking for another pair of gloves.

TSABG:(fixing me with a stern look) "Wait right here." and started rummaging through a bag behind their table.

The second Testicle Squeezer was randomly checking another bag...

YT:"Yeah- the TSA wears those gloves to protect themselves, not the public."

The TSA agent gave me an extremely nasty look...

YT: "Yep- Syph, lice, the clap, ringworm, staph, strep, and a host of viruses all are part of the possible fringe benefits when they don't change those gloves..."

The woman whose bag was being checked looked horrified.

YT: "Yeah- all part of the illusion of security."

The other agent finally got back with fresh gloves and started to check my bag.
And did a really poor job of it, I have to say.
I continued my TSA-is-bullshit rhetoric...

YT: "Yeah- although you THINK this is just staying a step ahead of the terrorists, it's really just an admission that you don't do a good enough job at the main screening location."
TSABG: "Here's your bag. You're good to go."

My fellow Frequent Travelers:
Make the TSA change their gloves before they touch you or your belongings...
Every time.
You're in more danger from the TSA transferring a dose of lice or a staph infection to you from a random stranger than you are from a terrorist attack.