Showing posts with label Bloggers. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Bloggers. Show all posts

Thursday, May 15, 2014

Lunch With the Brotherhood

Lunching with a couple members of the ODMQD* we got to discussing politics (duh).
One of the Brothers had read my latest screed and brought (on his iPad) an email regarding the dangers of being opposite the Clintons and how it can be hazardous to one's health.
 Federal agents killed in the Branch Davidian raid in Waco, Tom McKeehan, Conway Le Bleu, and Robert Williams, were former Clinton bodyguards. (February 26, 1993)

    Attorney Paul Wilcher, who investigated drug and gun running out of Mena, Arkansas and their links to the Branch Davidians, died of undetermined causes three weeks after submitting a 99 page affidavit to Attorney General Janet Reno. (June 23, 1993)

    Four Marine presidential crewmen who escorted Clinton on the flight to the Carrier Roosevelt, Maj. William S. Barkley, Capt. Scott J. Reynolds, Staff Sgt. Brian D. Haney and Sgt. Timothy D. Sabel, died in a helicopter crash. (May 19, 1993)

    Others associated with Clinton's March 12, 1993 visit to the Carrier Roosevelt (the meeting aboard the Roosevelt figures prominently in the U.N. Bosnia-Serbia peace keeping plans) who died in aviation accidents within four months of each other, include: Maj. Gen. Jarrett J. Robertson, Col. William J. Densberger, Col. Robert J. Kelley, and five Naval Aviators.

    Vincent Foster, Hillary's former Rose Law Firm Associate and legal council to the President, allegedly committed suicide, using a non-traceable hand gun, built from parts of several guns. Shadows of doubt cast by reports of not finding a suicide note were addressed when a note was miraculously produced much later, torn into pieces, void of fingerprints. Missing was the piece where the signature would appear. (July 7, 1993)

    Paula Gober, who traveled extensively with Clinton as his interpreter for the hearing-impaired, was killed in a solo auto accident near Monticello, Arkansas. Her body was found 33 feet away from her overturned car. (December 9, 1992)

    Clinton's State Attorney General Susan Coleman, who allegedly had an affair with Clinton, was shot in the back of her head.

    Arkansas pornography and prostitution ring 'model' Judy Gibbs, a frequent sexual partner of then-Governor Clinton, burned to death in a fire inside her home following her decision to cooperate with police.

    Clinton strategist and Democratic National Committee Political Director, Paul Tully, was found dead of unknown causes in a Little Rock hotel room. (September 9, 1992).

    Clintons national finance co-chairman and operator of a telecommunication service used by international police, C. Victor Raiser II, and his son Montgomery Raiser were killed in a private plane crash. (June 30, 1992)

    Clinton fund raiser Herschel Friday, an attorney from Little Rock, was killed in a single-engine plane accident.

    Clinton administration advisors on health care reform Stanley Heard and Steven Dickson were killed in the crash of their rented plane shortly after takeoff from Dulles Airport.

    Jim Wilhite, a friend of Bill Clinton and a business associate of White House Chief of Staff Mack McLarty, suffered fatal head injuries in a skiing accident. (December 12, 1992)

    The death of prominent attorney, developer, and Clinton fund-raiser, Ed Wiley, was ruled a suicide though no suicide note was found, nor was there an apparent motive for suicide. (November 30, 1993)

    Clinton¹s Chief of Security in Arkansas, Jerry Parks, was found along a roadside, riddled with bullets. Files kept in his office were missing.

    Dr. Ronald Rogers, believed to be on his way to an interview to reveal information about Clinton to a London Sunday Telegraph reporter, died in a plane crash. (March 3 1994)

    A witness for Paula Jones, Kathy Ferguson, the ex-wife of Arkansas State Trooper and Clinton bodyguard Danny Ferguson, was shot behind the left ear. The death was ruled a suicide. (May 11, 1994)

    Kathy Ferguson's fiance, Arkansas policeman Bill Shelton, who was critical of the Ferguson suicide ruling, died of a gunshot wound behind the left ear. His death was ruled a suicide. (June 1994).

    Jon Parnell Walker, a Resolution Trust Corporation investigator probing illegalities between the Clintons and Madison Guaranty S&L, allegedly committed suicide by leaping from the top of a 22-story apartment building.

    Stanley Huggin, an investigator into Madison Guaranty Savings and Loan, was found dead in Delaware.

    Admiral Jeremy M. (Mike) Boords, Chief of Naval Operations, shot himself in the chest with a .38 caliber handgun a few minutes before her was to be interviewed by a Newsweek reporter. He was tipped off that he would be asked two questions: Did he know Jonathon Jay Pollard? And, was he Pollard's 'handler' at the Navy Department?

    Commerce Secretary Ron Brown, 34 American industrialists and flight crew aboard the Presidential plane Air Force-2 were killed when the Boeing T-43-A crashes into Sveti Ivan, Croatia, April 3, 1996. Air Force Stewardess Shelly Kelly, who is riding in the tail, sustains only minor cuts and bruises, and was able to board a rescue helicopter without assistance. She later dies at the hospital from loss of blood. According to journalist Joe L. Jordan, an autopsy later reveals a neat three-inch incision over her main femoral artery that was inflicted at least three hours after all her other cuts and bruises. Clinton hastily orders all bodies of the victims to be cremated.

    Maintenance Chief Niko Jerkuic, in charge of the radio beacon that guided Air Force-2 to the runway at Cilipi Airport, commits suicide by shooting himself in the chest. Cilipi¹s air traffic controller also commits suicide and the tapes of the control tower disappear

And the hits (heh) keep coming. (Benghazi, etc.)
I've seen this bit o' foolscap before, and it seems like it's going to be getting more life (heh) as the political seasons start to ramp up...

My man xbradtc over at Bring the heat Bring the Stupid opines that the most dangerous job in the world is to be an associate of the Clinton's...
Based on the proffered list, one might think so.
(The only more dangerous occupation/pastime for anyone, especially young urban males is "turning his life around")

Regarding the *cough cough* unfortunate circumstances *cough cough* of the demise of damn near everyone that pisses off or has dirt on the Clintons - I immediately head over to the bastion of debunking to look up the Clinton Body Count.
Sadly- the operators of Snopes are tried-and-true kool-aid drinkers of the Left, so you have to be a little careful with the "pay no attention to the man behind the curtain" you get regarding anything damaging to Obama, the Clintons, or the Left in general.
In this particular case they give a quick handwave to all the items-
"it could happen to anyone, nothing to see here... move along"

Well... whether there is a Clinton Kiss of Death or not, things are going to get quite interesting in the next few months.

*Don't ask.

Monday, January 27, 2014

Geography, Socio-Political Impacts and Cultural Extremism in Sochi

"Holy Moley, this place is a shithole."

I've survived two previous trips to Russia prior to arriving on the 19th of Jan...
I spent a fortnight and a bit in the lovely garden spot of Kazan, Tatarstan in July, surrounded by college girls and 40+-year-old hookers...

I also spent the better part of a week on a site survey and test session in Krasnodar and Sochi, where I devoted most of my time to eating and drinking, and the remainder to throwing up.

Knowing there must be more to life in Russia, I thought it best to make inquiries about geography & culture from someone that has some history in that region...
I figured the best source for info would be the guy who conquered it years and years ago,
the one and only  Dread & Awfulness, the Czar of Muscovy, Божию Милостию, Император и Самодержец Всероссийский.*

So I tossed off a quick note to his Dreadness:
...I’m attempting to curry favor as I will shortly be leaving the sunny shores of Sydney and heading to my next gig in Sochi…

Any words of wisdom on dealing with the Georgians, Caucasians & the rest of the rather angry horde on the edge of the Black Sea?
Lo & behold, I was blessed with not only a reply (that didn't burn my skin off upon reading) but helpful hints...

First, yes: stay in Sydney. Why the hell leave there until late Spring, Northern Hemisphere?
(Yours Truly: I wish. Even if only for the bacon...)

Heck, it has been a long time since the Czar was in that part of the world, but yes. As you know, Sochi comes from the Tatar words со (“free sample”) and чи (“whores”), and is truly a miserable place. Be glad you are going in the month of лютень, because the sparrow-sized mosquitos will have finally died and even the old Baba Witch Woman of Odenska Street will have finally put a top on.
(YT: Dead skeeters, yes. Topless 110-year-old ბებია, alas, still topless. And cleans the rooms on my floor in the hotel. And somehow manages to enter my room every time I get in the shower. Fail.)

This is how we remember it. But you are going for the Olympics, and by golly, yes: the Czar has plenty of advice for dealing with Georgians, Caucasians, Armenians, and the Tartary-types that mill about the place. Fortunately, despite the wonderful diversity of cultures there, dealing with them is pretty much the same: you lop the men’s heads off with an axe and use your horses to scare the women widows and children into the woods. If they refuse to leave, burn their homes. But start the fires below the window lines so that the chimney effect burns them up faster. For effect, have some of your brutish men turn over their carts.
(YT: Alas, the ДПС confiscated my trusty Gerber Weapons "Castle G" Series, Czar edition Battle Axe - The two-handed 1721 model- Perfect for lopping the head off a papal emissary, so says the commemorative paperwork- the first time through Mag & Bag at the International Broadcast Center. I did get to keep my Bic lighter, so the fire thing is gonna happen.)

Also, don’t poison the wells: the water is filthy in that area, and largely frozen. To avoid cryptosporidia and giardia, you will want to keep those unfrozen wells potable for your return journey—one assumes you are sacking the Uzbeks—along the Terek River.
(YT: Yeah... I'll tell ya, right now, most wells and all standing water in the area are pretty much open sewers at this point. Nightly disinfection of all outer garments [especially shoes and boots] is the only way to avoid ringworm, dysentery, typhus,  yaws and goiters. Best to just set yourself on fire and be done with it.)
Some Georgian phrases could help you here. “გთხოვთ, არ მომეცი მწერები” means “Please do not give me insects.” Also, “ამ ცხენის ხორცის ფრენა კვერცხები” is useful to complain to the whoremonger that your meal of horsemeat has fly eggs in it. A phrase you will hear a lot there is “გვამი მდინარეში ერთხელ,” which means “There is a corpse in the river again.”
(YT: I've also learned, from a local horizontal dictionary the phrase "ჩემი საფრენი ნავი სავსეა გველი თევზი" which she tells me is a loose translation of, "Please bring me another carafe of your best wine", but sadly I am not using the correct pronunciation as all I get in return is a bucket and a fishing pole.)

But maybe they cleaned things up a little since the Czar was there. But probably not.
 Well... Um. Helpful. Yes...
Many thanks to Dread & Awful. His advice is just like most Microsoft products...
Perfectly correct, and completely useless.

*I have had several run-ins with The Czar and lived to tell the tale, but have been as yet unable to relate the events of that fateful day to anyone.
I caution anyone seeking to go Mano-a-Czar-o with his Awfulness get their affairs in order. And bring a nice cheese when they go.


Tuesday, December 24, 2013

From the Mail Bag

While researching CC Moore's "A Visit From St. Nicholas" I came across some versions I hadn't seen before, some which I sent off to various friends that I thought might find them interesting...

I got one back (thanks RC!) that I don't remember reading before. Based on it's vintage, some of you might have seen it before... If not- please read and take to heart the message.
Merry Christmas, My Friend
(a perennial military favorite)

Twas the night before Christmas, he lived all alone,
In a one-bedroom house made of plaster and stone.

I had come down the chimney with presents to give,
And to see just who in this home did live.

I looked all about, a strange sight did I see,
No music, no presents, not even a tree.

No stocking by mantle, just boots filled with sand,
And on the wall pictures of far distant lands.

With medals and badges, awards of all kinds,
A sobering thought came to my mind.

For this house was different, so dark and so dreary,
The home of a soldier, now I could see clearly.

The soldier lay sleeping, silent, alone,
Curled up on the floor in this one-bedroom home.

The face was so gentle, the room in such disorder,
Not how I pictured a United States soldier.

Was this the hero of whom I’d just read?
Curled up on a poncho, the floor for a bed?

I couldn’t help wonder how many lay alone,
On a cold Christmas Eve in a land far from home.

The very thought brought a tear to my eye,
I dropped to my knees and started to cry.

The soldier awakened and I heard a tough voice,
“Santa, don’t cry. This life is my choice.

“I fight for freedom, I don’t ask for more,
My life is my God, my country, my corps.”

The soldier rolled over and soon drifted to sleep,
I couldn’t control it, I continued to weep.

I kept watch for hours, so silent and still,
And we both shivered from the cold evening’s chill.

I didn’t want to leave on that cold, dark night,
This guardian of honor so willing to fight.

The the soldier rolled over, with a voice soft and pure,
Whispered, “Carry on, Santa. It’s Christmas day. All is secure.”

One look at my watch and I knew he was right,
“Merry Christmas my friend, and to all a good night.”
                                   - Lance Corporal James M.Schmidt, 1998


Sunday, December 15, 2013

Two Wheels Good...

I think I have found a worthy bike...
(Not for me of course. I'm a frugal bastard when it comes to things like transportation and domicile.
Firearms, however- No Expense Spared is my motto.)

No... I think this should be Borepatch's new ride...

Oh yeah, baby. That's a ride.

That's a Confederate Motors X132 Hellcat...
It's only $55,000 USD... Payable in Bitcoin or Krugerrands...

I originally was going to suggest Borepatch pick up a Gurney Alligator, since he had some issues with keeping both feet on the pavement as full stops.
This seemed to be just the ticket...

Looks to be a pretty sweet ride...

But that Hellcat. Mmm.
I had a mite powerful desire until I saw this:

It just took all the wind out of my sails when I saw that pic.
Oh well.

Maybe I'll just keep checking Craigslist for a R1200GS for the right price.


Friday, December 13, 2013

An Addition To My Christmas List...

While up in Krasnaya Polyana we had a bovine encounter that gave me pause...
Young Ribeye here was pulling the old Black Knight schtick-
"None shall pass!
Only after I actually got out of the car and had a serious man-to-pot roast discussion did he mooooove along.
So this got me thinking about other possible critter encounters. Doubtful that they will have, oh, say, brush-tailed possums, but I'm damned sure there are bears in the area.
I'm wondering is the Dread & Awful Czar might have an old set of Russian bear armor sitting around Castle G, mouldering away in a crate next to the big box with the Ark of the Covenant, the bag full of fragments from the One True Cross, and the Blessed Slot Machine of St. Bernardine of Siena.

I wonder if they have one in XXL?


Friday, July 13, 2012

Signs of the Apocalypse - London 2012 - #3

Take the hint, chatty Yanks-

Engaging the bus coach driver in idle chit-chat as he is trying to negotiate central London morning traffic is a bad thing. Knock it off.

Assisting the masses: Language help
We're trying to help the US NBC crew adjust to the language differences here in merrie olde England... ...With visual aids from the Pantless One himself!


Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Suffering from CRS...

(Actually, I don't suffer from it... I enjoy every minute of it.)

Now... I was going to blog about something....
What was it?


I forgot one important site on the blogroll...

The Gun Blog Black List

Holy crap!
A more complete listing of Gunny folks you will not find!

One nice thing is that the list is not a "pay for listing" site- it is a labor of love by one individual that finds, examines and lists appropriate sites...
The GBBL is a collection of bloggers that I choose to list (or NOT list as I see fit). No one pays me to list them. There is no paid advertising on the GBBL. Any 'ad' on this site is there because I choose to put it there. I don't make any money listing blogs.

I list blogs to encourage personal connections between bloggers and to add to the blog community. I do this because I want to.

Punk-assed pinko commie bastards can ignore the above message. This means you, T-Rav.


Monday, July 09, 2012

Blogroll Additions

Been needing to add a few people to the Blogroll...

The most recent first-
Stephen at Standing Outside Looking In - found his site via a post at Tam's...
Got caught up reading his older posts. He's been blogging just over a year and has some really entertaining stuff.
Added to the blogroll and on my RSS feed... is the place.

Double Trouble @
is also on my daily reads list...

I don't know how I missed adding OldNFO to the blogroll...
He was one of the bloggers I met up with in November (or was it December?) last year.We spent an afternoon and an evening in good conversation, along with the fair Brigid. Good food, good folks!
OldNFO @ Nobody Asked Me - is a good site for you to read on a daily basis too...

MauserMedic @ Mausers, Medicine & Motorcycles
I found Mauser Medic's site after he commented on one of my recent blogposts... His site is quite a good read...

I've been reading Evyl Robot @ Evyl Robot Soapbox for a while- I had been reading his better half's site - In Jennifer's Head for quite a long time (and on the blogroll too), but got hooked on ER when I was doing some research on having a custom holster made...
Check him out.

And finally - 3 Boxes of BS is another recent addition to my reading list.
Another Texas blog- He's putting together the DAB II on September. Good stuff here...


Saturday, July 07, 2012

Hung Drawn & Quartered

101 ways to start a fight, part the 14th

Famous the Borepatch suggested finding a pub called "Hung Drawn & Quartered" in the Tower Hill section of London.

Fortunately, Tower Hill is just around the corner from the Tower Hotel.
How convenient!

One sparkling cider and a ploughman's plate (pickled vegetables, cheese, bread, fruit) later, I was trying to get my bill cleared and head back to the hotel...

Hm. They musta heard I was coming...

This is where the post's secondary title comes in...

No matter how funny it might seem in your head, clearing yout throat, holding up a 20-pound note and announcing to the entire bar (or at least to the 10 closest guys at the bar):
"Hey, do any of y'all know who this old guy is on the 20 pound note?"...

.... is NOT a good idea.
Not just a couple weeks after the Diamond Jubilee. They get a mite testy.


Thursday, July 05, 2012

Menawhile, Over At The Other 'Site...

So... I just spent 7 dog-years toiling as one of Bettman's Minions, and now I'm off to London.

A good number of Constant Readers have enjoyed the tales of the trials and tribulations at the various Olympic cities over the past few years...
Ready to be entertained/horrified?

This year I have a good number of tasks to attend and the venues that I will be supporting are spread out across London, and I'm not exactly feeling benevolent toward the whole shebang...but I will be continuing to publish my daily update.

If you have a preponderance of free time and/or you're one of those people that creep by a multi-car freeway accident looking for the bloodsmears on the asphalt, then by all means, please stop by and take a peek. You might find something of interest.

London 2012 Unofficial Staff Update Site
A/K/A - "6 weeks of British Cuisine and Dental Hygiene, Just shoot me now, please."

Hopefully I will be back in time for DAB II, which I will be doing my best to attend.


Tuesday, June 19, 2012


Finally found a Castlewarming gift for my next trip to the Plain of Leng.


Monday, June 18, 2012

Signs, signs, everywhere signs...

Robb Allen  the Pantsless One at Sharp as a Marble, sums up my exact feelings about signage dumbassery in a clear and concise post...

Signs do nothing to stop a criminal. The law abiding tend to follow them. What this means is at the very time someone with ill intent enters to do harm, the very people you need to be armed, aren’t. If signs against objects worked, why not simply change them to say “No crime is permitted”. That way, the law abiding can remain within the bounds of your rules while not putting them at the mercy of the criminal?
(emphasis mine- TBG)
Robb always brings Teh Smart... Go. Read. Be Enlightened.


Saturday, June 02, 2012

Fighting Ennui

I was in search of diversions a few weeks back and I reached out to The Czar at Castle Gormogon (Interested? Contact Castle G, Plateau of Leng RFD) to see if they had any entertaining sideshow exhibits.
"Most Dread & Awful,
I’ve been quite busy of late, and due to a tedious business with a certain drag queen in Pocatello Idaho I have had to shut down my website for a bit and go low-drag in order to avoid the Dogs of Law…
However, I really need to plan a little getaway before my summer schedule begins, and with the need to avoid my normal haunts and local bars I was planning on making another run at visiting the Plateau of Leng and Castle G…
One thing I am particularly looking for is an abyss for gazing into, and in a typical Nietzsche-esque fashion, be gazed into…
So, y’all got a Bottomless Pit of Despair, or maybe just one of the regular sort?
TBG, 2012 vacation planning.

Although he had a suggestion or two I still had to search high and low for a true abyssal void...

One of the things I discovered that there are some rules concerning visiting and looking into bottomless pits...
I guess everything has it own etiquette and protocol.

Viewing the Bottomless Pit  -  The Rules:
  • Please behave responsibly when standing near the bottomless pit. No shoving or roughhousing. Do not pretend to push your friend into the pit and then grab the back of his shirt and pull him backward.
  • The bottomless pit is not a trash bin. Please dispose of all waste in the clearly marked receptacles.
  • Do not throw coins into the pit. It is not a wishing well; it is an eerie and some say unnatural phenomenon that appears to defy all earthly laws. Then again, that would also seem to describe any wishing well. Go ahead and throw the coins.
  • Do not attempt to jump over the pit unless you’ve gotten a good running start.
  • Do not drop handwritten messages into the pit in an attempt to communicate with people in China, the denizens of Hell, or the Mole People. Scientific analysis has determined that the pit does not lead to any of those places, but does not rule out the possibility that it could be a vortex leading to another dimension. So please address all correspondence accordingly.
  • You may hear a strange voice whispering in your ear to, “Jump! Jump in and end it all!” Don’t fall for it. That voice is coming from Doug, one of our eternally bored attendants.
  • Do not throw your car keys to someone standing on the other side of the pit unless that person is a good driver with a healthy respect for other people’s property.
  •  Chest-kicking someone into the pit in a re-enactment of that famous scene from the movie 300 is highly discouraged, unless you can deliver the line “This… is… Sparta!” in a moderately amusing way.
  • Please note: When you stare into the bottomless pit, the bottomless pit stares back at you.
  • When, despite all of these precautions, you still manage to fall into the pit, please do not shriek as you plummet to whatever dark fate awaits you. Ghostly echoes of your scream can reach the surface for several days afterward, and this can put a damper on everyone else’s enthusiasm when viewing the pit.
  • Failure to comply with any of these rules may result in a barrier of thin twine being erected around the pit.

*The rules by Ralph Gamelli

Friday, June 01, 2012


One of my favorite bloggers recently hit a milestone...
Brigid, of Home on the Range is celebrating her fourth anniversary of starting her 'blog... 7 million readers over the years!

Go visit her site...
A black-lab owning redhead with a passion for writing amazing prose and sharing her prodigious catalog of recipes with her readers is a treat not to be missed.

(And speaking of that, check out the recipe for her Disappearing Appetizer...
I'm made this, and I'll tell you, the stuff is addictive as crystal meth.
And try the Guinness Shepherd's Pie. OMFG. )


Sunday, January 22, 2012

Signs Aren't Working?

The Czar of Muscovy (Dread, awful, etc) over at The Gormogons highlighted an incident over in Spartanburg SC.
A pair of choirboys attempted to turn a Waffle House into an ATM, an occurence that a little Google Fu will tell you is a quite common pastime for said chiorboys nationwide. Mr.Concealed Carry was on hand, got the drop on them and tried to hold them at gunpoint, whereupon one of yon choirboys decided to test Mr. CC's resolve and got hisself ventilated.

Story here.
If you read the originating article, don't let the "waffle shop" identifier fool ya... It was a Waffle House.
I believe they are trying to introduce an element of plausible deniability since Waffle House has quite the reputation as a "gun free" zone, sorry, "criminally enabled" zone.

I've noticed it across the country... More often than not, WH has the famous No Gun/Weapons on premises signs prominently displayed...
There was one on the door of the Ohio WH where I ate last week...
Had I been carrying I'd have had to go elsewhere... I would be committing felony trespass by ignoring the sign, and I definitely wouldn't leave a firearm in a rental car outside a fast food joint at 1:00 am.

The Czar hits the nail on the head:
See how firearms create more violence? Now there’s one more fatality. If there was effective gun control, that customer wouldn’t have been armed, and instead there would be only...wait. No, that can’t be right.

Okay, if there was more effective gun control, instead of the customer killing one evildoer, there would have been only a mere...wait, no; that still results in more innocent people killed.

How about this: thanks to ineffective gun control laws, a perfectly innocent person elected to kill a person who was about to...heck, that’s an even worse way to put it.

Hmm. Seems no matter how you phrase the typical pro-gun control argument, this problem about no dead innocent people and only one dead bad guy keeps ruining it. (emphasis mine -TBG)

(Hmmm... Interesting- They gave me a knife so I could eat my country ham...
Seems like they are actually HELPING me violate their policy.)

More often than not Waffle House has a no guns policy. It is probably left to a franchisee's discretion whether to post a "Armed Robbers Welcome" sign on the door, and the law-abiding concealed-carry community has noticed... See here, here and here. Practice your Google Fu for many many many more examples....

I'll be very curious to see how this plays out...
There is a good possibility that Mr.Concealed Carry could very well wind up on felony charges if the sheriff in Spartanburg is an "Only Ones" aficionado, of if the local state attorney wants to make a big splash...
I like me some Waffle House, but they are really testing me...


Sunday, December 18, 2011

You Ain't The Boss of Me

Tam waxes eloquent on Human Nature, and more specifically, American Behavior.

Go. Read. That's an order...
Do not read it. US Gubbmint sez: It's probably bad for you.


Tuesday, December 06, 2011

1 Corinthians 6:19

 Good food, good friends-

I made a little detour on Sunday afternoon and dropped by Waco TX for a late lunch and good conversation with Famous the Borepatch. A little rum, some great tales and catching up...
I caught the Quote of the Week during our chat:
"Bad news doesn't improve with age." came out during an exchange about how to break bad news to Upper Management.

Anyone want to hazard a guess what was on the menu?
You got it...
A chicken-fried steak the size of a Ford Pinto.

Holy Mackerel!

Astute readers will note the Uncle Jay signature move: The double-starch side dishes.
Yep- Macaroni & Cheese AND mashed potatoes.

As The Mighty Skunk opined recently:
"Your coronary arteries must really hate you."
Probably so... But with this variable weather, I prefer to believe that my cholesterol is the only thing keeping me from freezing to death.

Life's too short NOT to eat chicken fried steak...
But at least I wait to have GOOD CFS... Life is NOT too short to eat BAD chicken fried steak. (I'm looking at you, Waffle House & Cracker Barrel...)

Abe Sapien: "My body is a temple..."
HellBoy: "Not anymore. Now it's an amusement park."
-HellBoy II

If I'd know I was going to live this long I'd have taken better care of myself.


Wednesday, November 30, 2011

The Quest Continues: Texas Schnitzel

So KX59 flips me a link when he hears that I will be in DFW...

Since you are going to be near Fort Worth, I found a truly epic chicken fried steak for ya...
Cowtown Diner in Ft Worth
 KX59 & the lovely and armed Southern Belle were the ones that took me to Goodsens in Tomball earlier this summer... it was the opening act in the Great Chicken Fried Steak Und Weiner Schnitzel Quest...
I had it in Texas, I had it in LA, and of course I had several orders in Berlin this year.

So, KX59 is trying to kill me -

The link he sent was about the "Full O Bull" Chicken Fried Steak challenge platter
9 pounds of chicken fried steak...
Think about a slab of CFS the size of a bath mat.

I could probably eat one...They give you all day to do it.
The problem is that you also have to eat 6 pounds of mashed potatoes, and 10 slices of Texas toast.

I avoided temptation and ordered the lunch version...

There was an issue-
I never should have held on to the menu after ordering.

As I was looking over the starters I saw this:

Oh my. Oh my oh my.
I was pondering an order of these deep-fried hand grenades and my lunch arrived.

Just the regular order was amazing.
And huge.

No way I'll be able to finish this beast AND and order of the deviled eggs.
CFS, green beans with bacon and mashed potatoes.

Probably not quite as big as the one at Goodsons...

But it was still really really good.

Did I finish it?

Does a cripple crab crawl?

If the Fates drag you kicking and screaming to Fort Worth Texas, mosey on over to the Cowtown Diner on Main St, between 1st and 2nd...
Sit at the bar and have Justin the barkeep tend to your needs and wishes.

As for that laginappe...
Yeah- I got an order of the deviled eggs to go.

They were awesome.

TBG- Stuffed to the gills.

(PS- Hey Borepatch- there is a special Easter egg in this post for you...)

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Tagged - First Car

Borepatch tagged me on the current cool kids chain letter, to wit:
1. What was your first car? Model, year, color, condition?
2. What adventures did you have in it, good or bad?
3. What happened to it, what's the end of the story?
My first car was a hand-me-down from my sister.
And contrary to Borepatch's suspicion, I didn't drive a Zamboni.
(Where he got the Zamboni thing I guess is due to my current "infatuation" with all things NHL. Alas, when I started driving had you asked me what a Zamboni was, I would have guessed it was one of those folded-over pizzas....but I digress.)

The car of my sordid youth was a 1972 Plymouth Satellite Sebring...
(Mine was blinding white, visible from 12 miles away, but that's another story.)

 It was a wonderful car- I could pack the ne'er-do-wells I hung around with into the machine and in less than an hour we're be breaking the underage drinking laws in Key West...

By virtue of the fact that I worked at the FBO at the local airport, I augmented the .68/gallon fuel with 100LL AvGas...
(This comes into play later in the tale.)

I did more than a fair amount of driving up and down US1...
I had a 30 mile (one way) commute to school that included 10 different 2-lane bridges, and being a high-school student, I was usually running late and burning up the highways.
I got pretty adept at high-speed driving on the bridges...

One of the good things about the bridges back then, they weren't wide enough for a u-turn, so if you did pass an FHP Trooper or a local cop, they couldn't turn around and chase you down...
And as a rule in the late 70's, they didn't call out SWAT for a roadblock to issue a ticket for doing 80 in a 65 zone.

Unfortunately, as time went by, and since I was dogpaddling in a pretty small population pool, the Burning Plymouth  became rather well known, as evidenced when I was on a return trip from dropping off a friend in Big Pine Key and I was late for work at the local radio station (my other job).
I was on the 7 Mile Bridge and passing the tourists that were creeping along at 30 mph ten cars at a clip... The front end was a good bit out of balance, so when the machine got moving upwards of 70 or 75, the steering would shake like a dog trying to pass a peach pit.
I didn't notice the Monroe County sheriff's deputy car in amongst the station wagons and other vehicles.

About an hour after I got to work, the officer showed up...

MCSD: "Son... I saw you on the bridge this afternoon..."
Uh oh.
MCSD: "Do you have any idea how fast you were going?"
TBG: "Uh, no officer... I was concentrating on my driving."
MCSD: "Well, neither do I. You went by so fast I thought my car had stopped and I started to get out to investigate."
As luck would have it I knew this officer, and he'd recognized my car. He knew he'd find me at the station or the airport. I got a 25 minute lecture about speeding, especially on 2-lane bridges, and contrary to popular opinion, 17 year old males are not indestructable, and although the community would likely survive the loss of a local highschooler, it would go badly were I to take a family of 4 from New Jersey along with me when I went.
Alas, he also knew Dad, who found out about my transgression immediately thereafter and, well, let's just say there was "some punishment".

I did some damage to the car during the course of my ownership...
I had a load of live rock and several 5 gallon containers of ocean water in the machine once, and tried to drive back up on to the highway from down on the shore access road... We were a bit tail-heavy and bottomed out hard...which is a nice way to say I smashed the shit out of the gas tank.
Did you know the gas tank on a '72 plymouth sebring was nigh on impossible to find back in the pre-internet days? And when the mechanic finally found one, it was re-dicking-fuckuously-expensive.

All good things had to come to an end...
The machine was in bad shape- burning that AvGas had taken it's toll on the seals and gaskets and I was putting in a quart of oil for every tank of gas I used...
Dad was not keen on me heading off to college with a car that was ready to fall apart...

I sold it to a local guy, not mentioning the oil consumption issue. (Caveat emptor, eh?) He came looking for me about a week later...
Purchaser: "Uh... Did you notice that the car burns, uh, quite a bit of oil?"
TBG: "Yeah... I noticed that. I usually put in a quart of oil every time I fill it up. That's why left you a case of oil in the trunk."
Not a happy camper...

I went off to UF with a florescent green VW Dasher with zebra stripe seat covers...

But that is a completely different story.


Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Addition to the Blogroll

Look over there to your left- you'll find a new entry on the blogroll.
Take a wander over to North and see the fun stuff he has at his site...

You could even add him to your RSS reader...

(I particularly like the Wednesday's Whiteboard of Wisdom.)

Welcome aboard North.