Sunday, April 21, 2013

Dispatches From A Nice Golf Course: "Dock that volunteer a day's pay!"

Tournament Friday, 2:00 pm
Things are going reasonably well.
(In a nutshell, I'm only moderately sick, play is underway and we are a data-generating machine.)

The last group is getting ready to tee off, so in 20 minutes or so we will start breaking down equipment on the First 9.

The phone rings... SGK* gets it.
SGK: "Ball position."
SGK: "Yes... We have volunteers on the 10th green."
(Longer pause)
SGK: "Could be. Let me check."
She puts the phone on hold.
SGK tunes our Live Feed from Hole 16 to Hole 10.
We all look at the feed.

Oh crap. You're killin' me, Whitey.

She picks up the phone-
SGK: "Yep. Hes ours. We'll take care of it."
(Long pause)
SGK: "Yes sir. I understand."
(Long pause)
SGK: "Yessir."
(Long pause.)
SGK: "Yes sir, I'll let him know."

She picks the mic for her radio.
SGK: "Hole 10 green, come in."
Radio: "10 green, go ahead base."
SGK: "Hole 10, is that you I see, sitting on the grass next to the greenside bunker? INSIDE THE ROPES? IN THE FIELD OF PLAY?!"
The figure stands up, moves out of camera shot.
SGK: "If I get another call from Tournament H.Q. about you, I'm going to move you straight to 11 green, back there with the moccasins and the copperheads.

After the ass-chewing I knew she got from THQ I'm surprised she didn't go out there and beat him to death with his Geodimeter... Or at least stab him with the tripod.

She's starting to get mellow in her old age...

*Other SGK@ANGC content here and here and here...



Old NFO said...

Ummm... I 'know' the brief was pretty clear... :-)

Borepatch said...

Next time we get together, we need to swap ass whupping stories ...

jon spencer said...

One does not cause an annoyance to the gods in green jackets.

The Big Guy said...

Actually, I do it quite often.
Not intentionally, mind you, but if I don't get a complaint about one of my people every day, I consider it a day where we just aren't trying hard enough.


Volunteers just don't f'ing listen.
Its like herding cats...