Things You Don't Want to Hear

Overheard at Second Cup @ 6:20 AM Saturday (coffee shop on Bay St.)
Two girls still in Friday Night Out garb having coffee and splitting a muffin.
TBG is minding his business, reading the Globe and Mail.
(By the way, Les Perreaux: Fuck you, motherfucker. Take your pity elsewhere.)

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Girl 1: "...your boss says 'We need to talk'."

Girl 2: "Ha. Your boyfriend says 'We need to talk.'; The boss says 'Come to my office.'"

G1: "Right. Or worse- 'Are you busy?'"

G2: "How about- 'Do you know how fast you were going?'"

G1: "This is Mr. So-and-So from BMO calling about your account..."

G2: "Oooo. I hate that. -How about this- Your mom, crying in the bathroom."

G1: "Yeah. How about your boyfriend crying in the bathroom."

G2: "Mine usually cries in the bedroom."

G1 & G2 Laughing...

Then the realized I was listening to them...

TBG: "Know what creeps a guy out? When a girl starts a sentence with: 'My old boyfriend used to...'"

G2: "I think the worst thing would probably be 'Honey, I'm late.'"

G1: "Then the girl usually hears 'We need to talk.'"


Canadian Girls: Scary from the word go.

TBG- ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒE