Engrish for Breakfast

The following is a telephone exchange between a hotel guest and room-service:

Room Service (RS): "Morrin. Roon sirbees."

Guest (G): "Sorry, I thought I dialed room-service."

RS: "Rye. Roon sirbees...morrin! Joowish to oddor sunteen???"

G: "Uh..... Yes, I'd like to order bacon and eggs."

RS: "Ow joorye den?"

G: ".....What?"

RS: "Ow joorye den?!... Pryed, boyud, poochd?"

G: "Oh, the eggs! How do I like them? Sorry... Uh, scrambled, please."

RS: "Ow joorye dee baykem? Crease?"

G: "Crisp will be fine."

RS: "Hokay. An sahn toes?"

G: "What?"

RS: "An toes. Joorye sahn toes?"

G: "I...uh...don't think so."

RS: "No? Judo wan sahn toes?"

G: "I feel really bad about this, but I don't know what 'judo wan sahn toes' means."

RS: "Toes! Toes! Why joo don juan toes? Ow bow Engrish moppin we bodder?"

G: "Oh, English muffin! I've got it! You were saying 'toast'... Fine...Yes, an English muffin will be fine."

RS: "We bodder?"

G: "No, just put the bodder on the side."

RS: "Wad?!"

G: "I mean butter... just put the butter on the side."

RS: "Copy?"

G: "Excuse me?"

RS: "Copy...tea...meerk?"

G: "Yes. Coffee, please... and that's everything."

RS: "One Minnie. Scramah egg, crease baykem, Englrish moppin, we bodder on sigh and copy... rye??"

G: "What ever you say."

RS: "Tenjooberrymuds."

G: "You're welcome."

(Thanks to Miss B for the email!)

TBG ow-