Thursday, September 27, 2007

Asshole

...I have received some requests, to wit: Tell me of this game, Asshole.
Hmmm..> Maybe it was "Tell me of this game- "Asshole".

Maybe it was phrased "Hey Asshole, tell me about the game."
Hell, I can never remember...

But- the game, Asshole....
It is a colorful and fun game. Everyone should play.
(Just don't do it with DanO and his minions. That way lies madness.)
I'm sure if I miss any details I will be corrected...

This, then, is "Asshole".

NUMBER OF PLAYERS: 4-8
SUPPLIES NEEDED: Full deck of cards, maybe 2 depending on amount of players.
POISON: Beer

DESCRIPTION / RULES:
Asshole is a game best played with a large group of people.
A very annoying game to explain, but very easy to play once you learn it.

For the first hand, deal out the entire deck to the table.
Next, most people sort their cards in numerical order, but
with pairs being higher than single cards.

(3, 5, 7, 9, A, 66, 888)

Now, the person with the 3 of clubs plays the first card.

Here are the rules for normal play:

- You must play a card that is equal to or higher than the previous card. A pair of cards are worth more
than a single card.

- If the same card is played, the next person is skipped and must drink. Playing a pair on top of a pair is a double-skip (2 people lose their turn)

- If a card goes all the way around the table without being beaten or cleared, it is then cleared automatically to the person who played it.

- Card exception #1: Playing a 2 "clears" the count. The asshole must take them away. In addition, the person who played the 2 gets to lay down a card after the pile is cleared (typically a low card).

- Card exception #2: Playing a 4 is a pass card. It as if nothing was played at all, but everyone takes a social drink.




Hierarchy:

The first person to run out of cards is the President. The last person is the Asshole.
With larger groups (6 or more), you may want to play with a Vice President and Vice-Asshole.

The next round:

First, the asshole from the previous round must deal out all the cards in counter-clockwise fashion. At this point, the asshole may make -anyone- drink that he pleases.

Beginning the next game, the President gets to exchange his 2 worst cards with the Asshole's 2 best cards (usually 2's or 4's). The same rule applies to the VP/VA, except with 1 card only.

In addition, the president gets to play the first card of the next round, followed by players in the order that they ran out of cards the previous round.

You may make anyone "below" you drink at anytime. (The president can never be made to drink, and the asshole isn't allowed to make anyone drink).

BONUS: If anyone manages to remain president for 3 rounds in a row, they get to establish a rule. Here are some of our favorites:

- Anyone who says "drink", "drank, or "drunk" must drink
- Anyone who says "I", "me", or "you" must drink (this one is brutal)
- Little Man Rule - you must take an imaginary "little man" off of your beer before drinking
- Left-Hand Rule - you may only drink with your left hand
- Paper-Rock-Scissors Rule - the president may make anyone paper-rock-scissors at any point. The loser drinks.
- Insult Rule - a personal favorite. Any time a heart is played, you must insult one of your neighbors (left or right only)
- (add your own, there are TONS of em out there)

TBG out- Drinking.

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