Tuesday, August 08, 2006

A Week in Vegas

Well...
Orange County to Jacksonville to Vegas and back to Jax Again.

Las Vegas...
Bright lights. Free booze. Basketball.

Let's set the scene for Las Vegas, shall we?

I'll hit the important points and some words to live by...

Breakdown of the WTT Finals in Newport Beach, California was less than fun.
(To put it mildly, it was a monumental pain in the ass...)
It was a long, hot afternoon in the California sun, and after it was over, the Newport staff took off for the post-party with promises of "We'll be back in an hour to help you load the scoreboards into the shipping case..."
Note: Scoreboards are 8'long and weigh 400+lbs. It took six of us to wrestle them into place.

Lessons learned:
At the end of a long event, make sure the event staff on-site commit to helping with the breakdown of equipment, no matter what time it is. Don't let them leave before the job is finished.

Breakdown started about 5:30 in the afternoon; I had pulled all my cables, tarps, radar displays, and scoring systems and loaded it all into shipping crates. It had taken about two and a half hours- now it was just a waiting game... I figured the Newport Guys would be along shortly, ready and refreshed.
Ha!
At about 8:00 I couldn't wait any more and shanghaied the Hawkeye guys, Chris Perry and John Mason, to help me with the boards... It about killed them, but we muscled the boards up to the ground level and got them into the shipping case.
Around the time I had finally put the final seals on the last shipping case and stacked it all for pickup, the Newport Guys showed up. Thouroughly buzzed.

"Well... Y'all ready for your workout? We need to move the scoreboards off the court." I told them.
"What? Now? You're kidding! We can't do it now..." they whined.
"Oh no... You said you'd be back to help-"
"But...but...what about in the morning?" they pleaded.
"Oh no. I have a flight to Florida in the morning. Do you have work gloves? These things will tear up your hands without gloves..." I told them, pushing them toward the center court.
They were about to cry...

I let them off the hook.
"Never mind- The Hawkeye guys helped me load them."

Lo, the rejoicing lasted for days.


Restaurants & Closing Times

We (Chris, John and Yours Truly) were starving- since end of play was about 4:30, we missed the dinner hour, and it was all asses and elbows until 9:00- we were racing to hit Agora before 9:30.
Why 9:30? Because that was the final seating time.

Restaurant folks- WTF is wrong with you people?
If you are open from 4:00 PM to 10:00 PM, BE OPEN FROM 4 UNTIL 10!
Agora- (which has great food, don't get me wrong..) opens at 4 but doesn't start serving until 5:30 (huh?) and closes at 10:00, but won't seat anyone after 9:30.
Restaurant staff get pissed off when a party of 4 rolls in 15 minutes before closing...
"But we've already started cleaning up." they complain.
Bullshit. You're sign says "open 'til 10". Serve me.

Don't lead me on with "Serving starts at-" and "Last seating-"...
And, by the way- if this happens to you, don't get snotty with the waitstaff once you are seated.... That is the best way to an order of the snot-flavored soup, and the urine vinegrette dressing on your salad.

So... Back to our hungry protagonists-
"No...we've already had last seating." she tells me at 9:10.
Needless to say, I went through my standard calming mantra:
Visualize the calm blue water off the Tortugas;

My hands holding the hostess' head under the clear cool water...
Count to ten in Hebrew.

Ah... much better.
Ok... we still need food.

Chris: "Look- There's a McDonalds."
Yours Truly: "I said 'food'. Do you know what the stuff from McD's is made out of? The crap that comes out of pencil sharpeners. We are NOT going to McDonalds."

Be careful of what you want.

So we cruised the outskirts of Irvine looking for a place to eat as the magic hour of 10:00 PM approached, we saw a neon sign advertising "Hamburger Mary's Bar and Grill".
Cool. Bar food. Can't go too far wrong.
(Boy was I mistaken.)
We piled into the restaurant and took a seat at a booth.
Then we got a good look around... Hmmm...
A couple pairs of guys on the dance floor. Several pairs of women that were sitting dangerously close to each other at the bar.
Decorations straight out of "Priscilla, Queen of the Desert". Some other props straight out of Rocky Horror.
"Uh, guys. I don't think we're in Kansas anymore."
The Hawkeye guys were also coming to a realization that we were in some kind of Alternative Lifestyle watering hole. They didn't mind, and as for me, I could give a shit... As long as they were still serving food, I don't care what was going on to the beat of Baltimora's "Tarzan Boy" over under the disco ball...
2 steak dinners and a chicken platter later we were outta there, none the worse for the wear...
If you're looking for a good time... (Depending on your own personal proclivities, of course,)
You might want to check out Hamburger Mary's, on McArthur, near the OC airport.
Tell 'em The Big Guy sent you.
(The one who threatened the poofy bartender with physical violence due to a overly suggestive leer.Heh.)

Airport fun.

Now, at some point in the previous few days a gig came up for USA Basketball, a game in Las Vegas between Team USA and the Purto Rico team. And, as per usual, I arranged for game ops and support for this little slice of heaven.
I needed a Statistician (Pat Gehm in Houston) for the game, along with the stats equipment, which was in Jacksonville. And the game was on Thursday night...
What with costs for one-way flights and all, it basically required me to go back to Florida for 6 hours rather than going straight to Vegas. Geez.

So this week's travel schedule-

Monday AM- Depart OC, through Houston, to Jax, arrive 10:30 PM.
Go to the office to pick up equipment prepared by the Help Desk.
Home at 12:00, midnight.
Repack bags.

Tuesday AM- Leave for airport at 5:30 AM. (Home for 5:30, sleep for 4 of those.)
7:10 flight- Jax, Houston, Vegas. Arrive 3:00PM.
Go to arena, see when ESPN truck is due- ETA:9:00AM tomorrow.
Go to hotel, check in, Dead asleep by 5:00.

Wednesday: Up at 4:00 AM.
Go to Hooters Casino, gamble until 6:30am. (Lose $50.00)
Got to Graybar for cable and hardware for install. Breakfast nearby.
9:00 AM Wed @ Thomas & Mack Arena, UNLV. Install wiring for USAB Game...
Depart at 6:00pm.
7:00 to 11:00, dinner & gambling at Mirage Casino.

Dinner- Samba at Mirage Casino


Yet another Churrascaria...
Passable, but nothing outstanding.

I'm not a fan of the Las Vegas rodizios.
At other churrascaria, they bring the meat around without ceasing until you throw in the towel. In Vegas, they bring each selection around once, then you have to request them to bring back the ones of which you want additional servings.
I'm not a fan of this process...
I want them to just keep bringing them to me, let me say "yea" or "nay"...don't make me beg.
This is the third rodizio I've tried in Vegas- Yoli's, Rumjungle in Mandalay Bay, and now Samba, and it seems to be a "Vegas Only" procedure.

Samba was nice...

Even though it felt a little like being inside a huge conch shell...

Oh well... Sunset was nice...


Thursday:
Game day was a bit stressful...
I was expecting Pat, my statisticaian, at around noonish...
I called to get his flight info... He wasn't going to make it at noon.
Let's just say "there were issues".
He called a bit later to let me know he'd be in at 4:00pm.
Geez.
Cutting it a little fine, but knowing Pat I had confidence.
I was more concerned with Continental... If there were any flight complications or weather issues, I would the one trying to stat the game...
ESPN would not be pleased with the stats if I was to be the one driving the machine.
I set 'em up and make sure they work, I can even act a spotter, but it takes some specialized talent to keep running stats on an NBA/USAB game.


Pat and his better (much better, I might be so bold as to say) half, Mary, arrived at four and I got them to their hotel, the Venetian, tout suite then I hauled ass back to the arena to finish off some continutity problems I was having.

The Venetian

I shot this the night before from the parking deck of the Mirage.

Pat made it to the arena about 6 and started game night prep; The game started without a hitch at 8:00pm and I had all out equipment broken down and packed by 11:15- By Midnight we were losing our asses at a single-deck blackjack table in the Palms Hotel, drinking with The Captain and enjoying every minute of it.

We bailed around 2:30 and discovered that In-N-Out Burger is NOT open 24 hours...

Mary is a junkfood junkie... We hunted around until we found a McDs that was still open, where we were able to blunt the edge of her cravings with minimal bloodshed and only vague threats of violence if the fries were not "hot and fresh, damn it"...

I took them back to the Venetian, then rolled myself back to the Hampton Inn where I slept until 7:30-

Friday
My flight was at 12:30pm.
I was packed and out of the Hampton Inn by 8:00. We had breakfast at the Venetian (Very good, if a bit limited buffet at the Cafe Grand Lux)
I still had a couple hours to kill, and since the minimum bets at the Venetian were 15 dollars a hand, we decided on a casino with lower minimum bets...
That's right- the Hooters Casino.
When I left them at 11:20, they were at a $5 dollar blackjack table drinking vodka like water and betting $25 dollars a hand and winning a majority of the hands.

I hit the airport like it was on fire, went through the TSA checkpoint with nary even a raised eyebrow, and was settled into Biz Class like an Alabama tick... 2 rum and cokes, a tasty snack, and 2 DVD episodes of "Firefly" later found us in Houston, and a couple hours later I was standing in the baggage claim in Jax, fuming as to why it takes 40 minutes from the time the plane stops moving until I get my bags.
This is UN-F%@#*%ng-ACCEPTABLE.

Ah, the calming mantra...

The cool, clear waters of the Tortugas...

My hands around the neck of the baggage handler, holding him under water...

Count to ten in Greek...

Ah... Much better.

Famous, out.

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